Don’t believe it’s too late
Be unrelenting when pursuing your fate
And if at any moment it seems unclear
Have no fear, the best is still there
Read this words and tattoo their meanings on your soul
Never look out of yourself for what will make you whole
Be at ease and breath in the light and fresh air
Float out of strife and never forget that grace is always near
Darling would you be reborn for me
I’m growing weary having not seen you in so long
I promise that despite my faults you would be free
I’m dying slowly and I don’t know how I can hold on
Your hand in mine makes this self come alive
I know I’ve shunned intimacy and you must think me a pretender
But this body has had to devise various stratagems to survive
And here I confess that this heart demands something tender
In the spirit of wild roses plucked to deliver to a wife
I’ve blossomed to reveal these secrets under the night’s skies
So let heaven be witness to a passion on which I stake this life
Because no stars light up the world like the shine I find in your eyes
This is what I’ve previously communicated in whispers
For a fear of being misunderstood and to save face
But how may this heart begin to know you whilst being an over thinker
Here, I must resist hammering on, let me give you some space
13/02/2025-11/03/2025
They tore me apart and left the ocean in my eyes
A love clot buried deep in my heart,
How do I live on when what I love, by my hand dies?
How else can my fractured mind confess to truth
When what the world wants is more and more lies?
I’m an island; inhabited but alone
Even though once I had been called man
This world no longer feels like home
I’ve dreamt of a heart from which love would never part
But what is freedom worth if it’s all my own?
This is the prayer I will in my being
With strength enough to raise the seas
“That nature remains, in spite of time
A gay reality unbereft of life’s glee
Technicolor filled skies and love among all human beings”
I’m trying to ask the truth to come alive again
It’s face having been tucked away for so long
Hidden beneath so many flaws, wounded hearts,
Scorned, betrayed, bleeding and barely holding on.
It warms to my touch and in my ears whispers
That for who I am, and the passions I now confess
Although I may be graceless, this soul is free
Is there something other you would wish me to be?
In the spirit of the roses stolen from the day to gift to the wife
The night holds secrets we’ve buried under it’s skies
***
I want you to never forget this
It’s just there
***
I feel I might have burnt through it all
The feel of the most beautiful angel in it’s fall
The trail I blazed through the heavens you made a wish upon schemes
Why do you reject this face that must bare hell for your dreams
***
I plucked this bug from my shirt
Squished it between my fingers
Then flung it out into the dirt
The sharp sting of my cruelty lingers
It may be out of sight
But may I impress this on your mind
***
I ran as fast as I could from this dream
That my words poured life into
My pages were an escape from life
The rivers of blood I drowned in
The love I longed for, the hate I grew in
My flower struggles to bear beautiful fruit
But it did, if only to soothe your wounded heart
The bond is broken, the words are a lie
No longer speak of love she says
Do you think yourself sly
***
If you could read
In my words all is bare
I’ve dusted the muck
So my confessions run clear
Yet you think me sly
***
13/09/2024
Ki kọ kin kọ (what we can and can’t describe)
Ti a ronu a a le sọ (that we perceive but can’t speak)
Ada f’owo kam igi (the cutlass hits the tree)
Igin mi, igi ṣin (the wood breathes, the tree splits)
Don’t forget to watch the first petals fall
He loves you, he loves you not
It’s almost struck midnight at the ball
What’s your name again? I’m sorry I forgot
The colors from your cheeks fade away
Now I’m afraid I made some mistake
I want to rebegin with a fresh canvas
As though my name were not the same
I want to bury away all of my treasure
Forsake the money, power and the fame
To experience anew the yoke of romance
and stick my chips on a game of chance
ask the belle of the ball for that one dance
If only she would give my way a glance
To watch the first leaves of autumn fall
She loves you not, she loves you
I could awaken the dead
with these words
But let them be the earth
that cracks through your flaws
My wickedness
flowing like righteous melody
All of your love
is a misremembered reverie
That I planted under winter’s breath
And sunned with torturous poison
This heart is dangerous
Wanting you like it could die
Hating your guts with a smile
A clever and uncompassionate wile
You disgust me like moss
These are the words
And I want you to read on
Yes you!
Don’t look away when I’m talking to you
You laugh it off
But that’s what I want
It’s the inners of this time machine
Read on!
You know what I mean
You didn’t think I could be this mean
You know what I mean
Now laugh some more
I wish you’d cry
And I know you will
Is that your heart sinking
Your breath lost
Come on, try to laugh it off
I’d like to chuckle as your tears fall
Oh, don’t worry, I’m not going to say it all
I always wanted to love a saint
To defile an angel
To bring love into the heart of a devil
To make paradise in the midst of wasteland
Come on, don’t give me that
You make me sick
Is this another one of your petty tricks
Yes, did I make your smile
Are you laughing at me
My stupidity
My gaiety
I hate you to death
So much so that I must love you
Do you hate me too?
My monsters feed off your misery
And they’re giants now
Tell me thank you
Don’t make me snitch
Don’t make me call you a
Nah, I love you too much for that
I wish you laugh loud at this
I wish you die
Then I would die too
What I would give to lie by you tonight
Under the starlight
Covered by alive earth
Resting into eternal death
But I want to hurt you
You know what I mean
You know what I mean
You don’t know what I mean
I’ve lost my mind in you
And there’s nothing else I can do
We were supposed to do this together
But hey, love’s just another word right
Stupid bitch!
I crawled on my hands and knees
My head bent at the foot of an altar
As I pleaded in earnest with the sage
To spare you in gold to a later age of oak
How hollow my wishes did seem to ring
As echoed back words they did sing
It covered my face with the rot of eschar
How did I get nowhere after going so far
I tore down curtains from all the walls,
So sunlight brings warmth to the home
At the heart of this temporal palace
Once broken with grief and cold with sorrow
In this place you can grow old and gray
Your memory cherished in beating hearts
I feel the profundity of the empty tomb
In the light from your virtue that abounds
It was a dreary December night
When I expended all of my might
Calling from a thousand miles away
Pleading with you to just stay
And make this tundra of a soul
Hospitable and somewhat whole
To be a sun radiating exploding light
A warmth in this cold and frozen night
It was a scythe that cleaved us apart
And left me morosely thinking what happens to the heart
When bodies are made to recoil by the earth
And our souls toils undone by death.
She told me about the infinite cyclicality of style
With a smile and gentleness I was remembering to love
How fashion trends would repeat every once in a while
Not all at once or together, bits remain, sizing with her hands.
She taught me how to make the most out of my misery
Even though in my mourning I rejected company
Her arms wrapped around me as I wept quietly
For moments she was mother and I was child, our cord unbroken
She thinks of me when she stares at her stereo
A betrayer of the truth, a stranger who baited scorn
I remember her when I see the blossoms of spring
How long till this love, conjured to last forever, is all gone?
I said to her, in a memory imagined “I fell for you while sipping tea
A hundred times before and ten times that to come,
And should we meet again, under arrangements desired or not
I will always fall, and you will always smile
Your face echoing my love, my love echoing style,
Broken by time and remade, seeming different but remaining, one and the same.”
Why do you keep dong this?
Pretending like I’m not here or can’t see
The countless hearts you’ve dared to Anubis
You sometimes act like you’re not free
Will you forgive yourself your old ways
Repent and promise to never again be the same
Or will you wait for another one of those days
And go back to being a dog, in love with the game
Why do you ask me to change?
You keep preaching implicitly calling me a failure
Acting like you have to offer me in exchange
Did you once, ever stop to examine your own nature?
Telling me about old, god!, you pontificating? That’s just rich
Behind the masks you wear, we all, are one and the same
If I err, you’re the one to emasculate, your mirror’s calling me a bitch
Don’t play nice like you gave a damn to even remember my name
Will the flood of my tears lustrate your soul?
Maybe erase the ink stains, so you don’t have to change the page
Its droplets from your daughters rain collected in a bowl
She hoped perhaps it would free you from the hate filled cage
Shall I water your poison tree till it’s apples are pure?
This is my only coax to you, I will leave if you choose to fight
I know the pain you hold in your chest, the hurt you had to endure
I’m here now, a gull in flight comes to rest at your side, everything is alright!
What’s the crux on which you would lay your life
On what lies or half-truths would you devote this soul
Would you burn it all to make light in this dark night
Will the fire of Love in my heart make me whole
It’s pain and burden, breaching the moats of human reason
A redefinition of existence in the aftermath of what you know
Here to stay and possibly to find out what it really means
Will joy, beyond tears and laughter, cast on earth a heavenly glow
A fog leaving you scatterbrained and separated from family
The feeling like you were born and lived just to die today
Blindly muttering under your breath, in the arms of a saviour, finally
Not seeing, not feeling, not thinking, ‘please give it to me Someday’
Devising ruses and despicable stratagems is the folly of the wicked
Blessed to surrender and gain is the reward of the strong
What gifts can we offer to those on the wayside to paradise as we build
Hopefully you don’t reply with trifle about, ‘not before long’.
To whom does the bounty of the earth belong?
What does it mean to imbibe the good fortune of freedom?
Is your story neatly within the limits of orthodoxy today?
Blind words of those preaching death and the singularity of someday?
I imagine life with the premise of a thriller upended
But how do I put into perspective it’s acts and innings
If the start to this production has barely finished
And we, it’s audience, call for the finale’s beginning?
To speak with the hidden ruggedness of un-carved wood
Not bothering to hold back a tear or two as you spoke
The visceral pain of losing a child, which I intimately understood
Hearing our silent sobs that night, a sleeping god woke
Stealing a tale from last night’s finished book
We bid into the wilderness with no plans to return
In the darkness we chanced upon a willow by a brook
After hacking at this tree of faith and eunoia,
We watched our fruits of desire burn
It was a journey around the world beyond the daring
I watched from the vantage of a collapsing supernova
The bright moon wanes behind the clouds weeping
Touch the black hole once, and this game, it’s all over.
My bravery and agility gives way to recanted stammering
On Earth I watched them dance promising to not let go
It’s funny what games the conscientious mind likes playing
The vessel is damaged, she laughs, he cries, Oh No!
The system cooled slowly, like a winter’s morning by the seaside
I’m lost in time and stranded in outer space, where are my maps
I love the mistakes we made, even when I found a gun by his bedside
Something for you to remember, as its meaning starts to delapse.
The scales possess and govern us in ways subtler than you think
And to hold a vision of resurrecting this broken palace built for angels
You who must be king, must become subservient beyond the brink
And understand as crocodiles, cockroaches, and worms do.
To Make Heaven, Know Hell!
Pronounced expressions of fealty
To uncompromising truth and civility
Marching so the world hears their piece
A revolutionary army splitting atoms for peace
The sum of all your fears
the closest to your heart left in tears
It’s a ticking bomb counting out the time
Never give way to the final line.
I keep talking to myself
muttering till I fall asleep
unintelligible to the wealth
of secrets in words I’m forced to keep
It’s sounding like an end
do it with no ounce of regret
you can close your eyes and depend
on this memory to get you wet
Emote in praise for the end of the world
and we commercialise our dead
with a new slogan: ‘Un-fuck the world’
haven’t you heard?
I wish you could understand
this terrible beauty of a game
it’s something unrequited and grand
would it ever grow tame
an invitation from the lacking to the drunk
a preacher raves in his asylum room
Ra’s Atet in hiding, today he lacks spunk
a pagan woodworker’s body rotting in it’s tomb
The story of the world
and casualties of war
the horrors of man
and promise of gods
a country’s dreams of peace
their earth fertilised with blood
the cries of a child
who wishes and comforts the mothers
its a mass coronary ejection
adrastea doesn’t forget it’s path
a few bodies drift on and on
the little blue marble wobbles
its a conscientious epilogue
but what did we learn from it all
a species waking up into discipline
but maybe, just maybe, after another one night stand
I drowned in the infinitude of that promised place
where we abandoned dreams and took flight apart
I’ve traveled beyond time and unconfined space
but nothing yet warms my heart, quite like your face
There’s words I think have been too often abused
but maybe I lacked critical depth and my analysis was wrong
In this winners game, some of us losers fear to be used
so we suffer our love too long, as in the heart it’s suffused
If I could speak magic words, to give you a miracle
call the powers of heaven to bring love into your town
take away the hate and make your demons to go invisible
could I see you in a wedding gown, and build something invincible?
What I would sacrifice to see you smile
Laying myself empty and bare for your use
when will I ever be free from this trap of a wile
would real love recoil from such an abuse
I gave my due, thinking myself wise
I made you Caesar / god, and to my great surprise
my virtues become vice, seeking recompense
I worshipped on an altar, without forbearance
I don’t even want to know what would have been
maybe it’s just me going mad as I watch you grow sad
I have harkened to truths whispered and unseen
the words I beckoned to life were to be seeds for the glad
It’s under control now, if you wish to know
so the world departs from us — even as you beguile
a forest to bloom under my control — and your glow
Its immeasurable magnitude, and the glimpse of your smile
Love and life, says my spellbound blue jay
Don’t take mine, says my prater mundane crow
Hold unto yours, teach it to play(pray)
Love your life and take(let) it slow(grow)
A reconciliation between heaven and earth
the storm clouds gather, break open, then disperse
a mother smiles for the child she would soon birth
cold wind blushes her cheek, she dons a warm dress
Winds howl songs to those who can hear
animals run around the garden as food is scattered
a master in his home has no fear
the melody slowly from her bedchambers he gathered
Both bodies feel a crises for the ages
the cord is severed and one is two
cries and smiles, bathhouse to bathhouse, say the sages
cries and smiles, crises and smiles, who is who
Breathe; feel and see,
these waves carry your body
enveloping until the will to be
dissolves like you’re every nobody
It remedies ails of the soul
make it religion, be the new convert
we seek what would make a whole
through methods open or covert
The truth, a slave, carries heavy chains
and walks alone in spite that all is it’s own
it’s willing to shoulder gruesome pains
for which you and I must someday atone
Breathe; make and power magic
I can hear the universe laughing at the show
find yourself beyond tragedy and the comedic
if you read the end of the script you would know
To live amongst the living
cursed in the forward for after
a struggle for meaning
in a hall of deafening chatter
To sing with reckless abandon
versus glossolalia practised to precision
nothing may truly grace the phantom
one or none is the soul’s aged mission
To weep into hands unclean
for the joy of new love unhatched
may seem unsightly to who has seen
the horrors of its bonds unlatched
To watch your child dance
water gushing from a burst garden pipe
the quiet whisper to give humility a chance
even if it’ll never live up to it’s hype
To dream of a time of peace unbound
freedom, its virtues expressed and vices tame
and it’s midwife, a call for holy war
demons and angels usher to watch a horrific game
She tasted like cigarettes
trying to swim in a pool of lust
but drowning in an ocean of sorrow
and she hated it
hated the fact that he could see
her cracked up layers
and her piled up fears
he held the petals
of her cardoon shaped heart.
She didn’t understand
that her smoke was his air
and he revelled the waves of her lust
enraptured in breathlessness of her sorrow
she sleeps on a bed of roses
but only feels the thorns
painting the white petals red
and every night they decompose
in the bottle of cold liquor
Out of berlin’s lights
with nothing else in mind
and only the wall in sight
oh…
she wants to enjoy the spirits and
maybe make love by the wall
and, anyone who cares could watch
blessed to ride and die
they are the freak show
and all of heavens hosts
acknowledge their place
sitting down at a table
sipping cold liquor.
We lost our bearings
Dancing to birds at dawn
Her laugh ending in a snort
Of the contagious sort
That I joined, rolling on the floor
My ribs aching and eyes wet
‘I feel so young, like a baby’
She said, making an angel in the sand
I leaned over and blew a raspberry in her belly
We both laughed some more
‘You make me a man, full of thoughts
And joys from a life lived’
I confessed into her ears
We laid, staring into the stretching horizon
I felt the waves lap under my warming skin
Her head found space next to mine
‘Wouldn’t you love to ride into the sun?
Just you and me’
‘Would we survive the trip?’ I asked
‘Would it matter?’ She replied.
My voice is hoarse from screaming
i’ve exhaled out all my love and all my pain
now you choose, from what you can see me sacrificing
whether or not it will all be in bloody vain
Perhaps I should have confessed that you’re all I need
but you know how pride and cowardice go hand in hand
I admit that I stumbled wilfully blind and driven by greed
but now, if you’ll give me a chance, like a man, I’ll take a stand
I never imagined the fates bringing our story near
that I may drive a dagger through this love here
I dream of words to say to you
But just the thought of your smile, clouds my mind’s view
A booming in the air
Life sure is fair
We all surely may atone
And pull gold from stone
A human experience
Something to unite all
Because before light hence
God called for us to have a ball
Delivering Binks Sake
To all our friends with merry cheers
Singin’, dancin’ and lovin’ for Humanity sake
Isn’t that what we all here for?
To Breath, Laughing in the Air of Freedom
I’m trying to will my text to life
Cutting pieces out of me with a knife
Writing with blood on the earth
Frantically before I run out of breath
Taking slow gulps of liquor
Slowly peeling whatever secrets of the night
Can be deciphered underneath Jamesons and jacks
Too bad all will be forgotten at first light
What deal will you make with the devil
In exchange for success and fame
Will you promise to finally be faithful to some woman or craft
Or cross your fingers, runaway and change your name
I’ll speak briefly of another life
Because that’s what I believe this is
I’m not there anymore
I was dead
Very very much dead
Wings carried me after I leapt from the window
I floated through the bardo alone
So it pleases me to breath the life radiated by friends
It’s stupid not to share all this love
Heck it wouldn’t even be any fun
The people are talking
Of starry glory and the end of the earth
Nuclear war and global warming
And subjugating another lump of dirt
What would be my point when I’m all said and done
I ponder aloud to the void within me
Perhaps or not my causes and works survive after I have gone
That they may show the lucky ones how to live and be
How to conduct a foolish search for meaning
Not for the wealth, power and fame
But that in the lights you connect honestly to your being
And not construe this adventure to be just a game
It is alchemical magic
This message i’m passing on the telephone
It’s the desperate tactic
Of a soul walking in this world alone
The karma police is knocking
It’s only kids playing with toys
People just enjoy talking
Sometimes it’s sweet music, other times it’s noise.
Serpentine love that she couldn’t touch
Distracted in a boundless ocean of too much
I’m paralyzed by the glow on her perfect body
Too bad to her I’m just a nobody
Confused in messagings of friendship
Are warring demons of our own making
Forcing activity between wrong and right
Transcendence and damnation, in attempts to bring forth a light
Close to Bedrock
We find the meaning: love
Surrounded by hurt
And this broken heart can hear you
The cup hands drip
Asking the spilled bits to flow
As a river in order to reach you
And become a wave that lifts you
Up into the cloud cover above
From a stream of limitless love
I keep breaking into prose
So I must cut before I begin
I ask the sprite to cast a pose
And my mind of what it means
The demons about hold no powers
Capable of altering this course
To be seen from it’s fruits and flowers
Beauty survives the darkness of loss
Raise a light, for I am weary in this sea
Waves slapping and weathering rock
Chipping away at the soul that makes me
And the heart I thought was safe in lock
To sweep away the ashes
And begin anew from detritus
Well, at least it’s not all over, this farce
Between the world before and the next
Unaware of who we ask to save us
I tried to write a letter to you
describing my lost faith
in attempt of being a better man
I asked god to forgive these sins
brazenly committed to it’s face
against it, but mostly against you
The birds sing aloud
what the winds already whispered to me
yet they punish my iniquity with love
’Tis my head that weighs heavy
with knowledge from many years
release, for me, would be a relief my dear
Hold me steady
because I don’t know how
I can remain on the straight and narrow
‘I’m struggling to find home in my skin’
may be the only coherent phrase
you will get out of me today
Anoint me
that I may recover my roadmap
fill me with hope for tomorrow
Put your fingers through my hair
like my mother did when I was younger
if you bring the joy, I can unearth love
And we will both shine
both your face and mine
brilliantly in the light and darkness
Perhaps you were the revelation
from a deity I struggle to know
but I don’t want to kill you too
Brilhantina pro cabelo
– Always yours,
Auguste J. Baudelaire
What is it that you want
To make your whole life better
To revamp you like a new font
A new trendsetter
I’ve been working
Day and night
I’ve been dreaming
Now finally seeing the light
A moment of silence for the ones lost in the dark
A second to remember the girl you kissed in the park
A time to rave with your hair ablaze and feet in the air
A notepad on the desk saying don’t just leave me here
Crystals and the end of summer
A Rocky fireball
Flying past millions of giants in the sky
A wish upon a star
Shooting through the sweet by and bye
A dream of flood
Swallowing up mountains from peak to valleys trough
A desert of blood
Skin and bones grinding in a land where life can be so tough
A man made god
An intellect with all the evil he had wrought
Our justification for slavery and the iPod
And all the countless wars we have fought
Step through the rhythms of my heart
And start a fire that will never depart
Get through on a call to Mr lonely
Take away the mask from Mr phony
909s and falling in love
Never fails to put a lift in my spirits
Black ‘n white hands ‘n glove
I’m trying to call with the rest of my minutes
If the streams continued to carry the seas
As the birds flutters among the trees
Will you look back to the city and me
Or would gaze into the horizon with masked glee
It fell gently if such a thing could be said
But the bridge that held this nation is fled
Perhaps a king will hold firm in her stead
The smiths called it, the Queen is dead
I stopped writing for you
And my warped point of view
This is my attempt to bridge the sea
Between what was and the is to be
And within cryptic words
Spoken in hushed whispers
I unearthed suppressed thoughts
From the heart that I lost
I glad in ignorance of if you ever loved me
For in this ocean you and I are but a few
And although it took a decade, I am free
Of the knowledge that I never had you
We named our Gods after our flaws
And inscribed it’s virtues
Into all of our rights, lore and laws
We spoke of great creation at once
But are oblivious to the fact
That light and dark are in a dance
From whence com’st thou to trouble my sights
And with my mind with you incessant fights
Be thou either shade or man I hereby demand
Declare yourself to be friends or foe lest I take a stand
Thrice I called out to you across the Styx an unbeliever
Drunk off of a bottle of stolen liquor
If you had heard and returned her back as I said
Perhaps I wouldn’t have laid siege to leave behind scores of dead
To where goes thou but to the city of gold
Searching for the bones of the kings of old
it is said that he who can survive past the drums and fife
Will be celebrated with rum and rewarded eternal life
Rock-a-bye quietly in this cradle
And drink this here soup from a ladle
I’m searching if there’s spirit in these words
But first, is the spirit with us anymore?
Yes sir yes sir, like a box of fresh rain
Trying to heal and wash away the pain
Inflicted when the light was asleep
And dark we had with ourselves to keep
How I wish you were here
To be in heaven is with you my dear
And without it’s not hard to tell
That this is a living hell
Can you feel this chemistry
It’s like we have been set alight
And even though we were once so teary
everything will be alright
I’m breaking daggers
That you’re forcing me to unpack
If they’re left unattended
They wittingly find a back
I’m hacking chains
Fixed to my limbs and nape
Would it hurt if I shot myself in the head
Or better still changed my name
Ramming my head into a brick wall
Waiting and tired to being alone
I’m not going to miss you most of all
I’m building myself a new home
Strange thing Love,
You’re giving it away
And it comes back harder
Love, i’m holding it here
And it keeps getting lost
Slow to love,
Making another Revolution
Fast asleep,
Feeling like a new born
And i’m smiling all day long
These years are like waves
That ebb and flow out of me
Gently carving meaning from life
The stars in the darkened night
Guide the babe emerging
From the ocean of the womb
Into a world in need to it’s light
Here I guide to the gates of nirvana
Past the streets of woe
And the hills of desolation
To the lands were angels do weep
In praise of manifold glory
To journey into this elysium
We mustn’t toast nor feast
In the halls of Valhalla
Waiting for that which comes in peace
To rescue you and her
Can you find the keeper of secrets
From high above the castle walls
Will you know the fate of the King
By divining with the bones below the keep
Can you hold your own
Against the will of the whole
Would your body listen to you condone
Acts that eat at your very soul
If I allowed you one wish
to pause this being
and return to a previous time
would you remember
how lovely the mess we were was
the fragility of this easter egg
we this fleeting thing called happiness
that we find in midst of rubble
from a forever ending bloodbath
gaddamn, it’s fucked up!
So if I allowed you a second chance
what would you change
or what would you like to watch again
would it be about the fabric of your soul
the mistakes that made you whole?
This thing we cherish so much
and want to hold onto
how would you manage to stay here forever
perhaps we could find away to make it work
i know you never say the word never
What do you think about the way I smile
Crooked teeth like uneven floor tiles
Lady please feel this heart in front of you
A touch me from a million miles away with your glorious view
What if I don’t awake to your kiss good morning
Snuggled safely in my cold blankets
Make me some tea
I’ll be right down if I sensed you waiting for me
She got so high
Floating into another world
And everyone says hi
From all around the world
Hey mama,
It’s the dawning of a new age
Wouldn’t you like to know
What I’ll write on this new page
I’m going out of my mind
Ripping at the seams
Those were his final words
That all was not as it truly seems
Then Goodbye.
I’m not going to disappear
When you say my name
I want to be with you right here
Each and everyday
Whether in the same
Or in different places
We will laugh in the spirit of play
A huge grin on both our faces
Take me to the ends of the earth
And swear that in life where adjoined so
We shall only be asunder in death
Find me in the next life like you always do
The spirit was dramatised
And the sun was incarnated as man
Just to be next to you
According to the original plan
Look for me darling
I’ll be waiting in the dark
Trying to ignite some light
Say my name when you’re near
Forever Yours,
August J. Baudelaire
Take the money and run
As far with it as you can
Maybe later you’ll have some fun
If you find yourself a better man
Take the money and run
But don’t leave me hanging
Without my Molly and the gun
Do you scroll on tick tock
Laughing or crying
As the time goes tic tock
Living closer to dying
Would you swipe right on me
After a long tiring day
And I wrote about anime and ice cream
And the board games I play
What is the truth behind the way you roll your eyes
And what will I tell from your hips which tell no lies
I don’t know how much longer I can keep this going
But hey, these were hushed feelings all the fucking way
Do you think I remember your favorite flavor or ice cream
And what necklace your wore on that night we talked about loss
I don’t know if it even matters to you
But could it have been too early to learn how to love
She spoke softly
Like the light of sunrise
But to those who understood
It was the middle of the night
Young heart of mine
we have reached the end of the line
of what it is to be
so forgive me if I set you free
Wake up Prince Charming
Your sleeping beauty awaits
Lady don’t run away from love
I know that what we shared was romantic
But leaving me with just a slipper is a bit dramatic
Will you forgive the skeletons in my dungeon
And that I trapped you all by your lonesome
Will you stay until the heart of this beast blooms
And perhaps show him true loving too
I’m coming back to retake the throne
I abdicated when I ran away from home
Thank you for believing in me
Let out your hair into the wind princess
And call out all the colours that’s you see
I know you want me
That’s why i’m hiding away these days
But I promise to show myself
If you swear to be good and kind to me
What if I died
Will you mourn my absence like a friend
Or will you forget that I ever was here
Just say a little prayer for me
Late night s**
And a longing induced cardiac arrest
Couldn’t hold me back from the end
But I needed some long deserved rest
Smoked potatoes
And a side of tomatoes sauce with gravy
Couldn’t make me forget the bile
You left when you spoke falsely of destiny
The world began in a similar fashion of how it will end
And i’m sure someday we’ll figure it out
And we’ll laugh for a really long time
Because after that it wouldn’t matter
I just want you to read
And have a good time
Writings should be enjoyed
At least the good ones
Steadily recollecting words
I wrote in a book from a long time ago
Looking at pictures
Of me smiling with an Afro
‘Does time not stop for no one?
Onward marching never quitting’
I’m so sleepy
Why is the bed so cold?
Let our minds mingle
In a wrestling match
And our ideologies have it out
In mortal combat
Let’s both have
Equal standing
Without regard for our age
Sex or our race
Let’s make a pressure pot
Filled with the best
And toughest of ideas.
When it begins to bubble
Tip the lid and let it blow
So that perhaps
Our thoughts would travel
And fly through the air
Everything has been getting better
Through science you say
More food, more money, the poor people are getting fatter
To more data you pray
The different narratives are fighting
And we shall be wept by its flood
The noise and lights will be blinding
And all that would be left is our blood
Everything is getting better
I conclude to retort
Just look at the weapons we have to kill each other faster
Sarcasm is a last resort
The ways we live our lives
To prevent elementary catastrophe
When the greatest one stares us back in the mirror
A mind with the power to make both,
and bring forth hell in pursuit of heaven
Hello world and all that you share
Hello world, the life we must bear
Goodnight void and all the space you take
Goodnight void, the price of heartbreak
Hello you, my loyal friend
A cozy pillar I knew I could always depend
Goodnight me, your sleepy traveler
Dozing in and out listening to Rammstein
Will you crack under the weight of
The load I must bear
Will I rest if I really must give
To the abyss, all my fears
If we were able to grab the meaning of it all
what else would we have for a purpose?
If we were privy to the secret of the mystery
would it not tear us apart from within?
Perhaps this question of evil we like to ask
Isn’t about how a god can permit this to occur,
but how can man will it,
knowing the pain and reality of suffering
choosing for someone else to die instead of him?
This seems to me to be the crux of the crucifixion myth:
that we must sacrifice for our fellow man
and each bear our cross to atone for all of evil.
this morning I tried to imagine a world
where we did our very best to accomplish this
It lead me to thoughts of Armagideon, but it could be Paradise.
– Yours sincerely,
Madeleine C. Claire
Forget love and our sickness for connection
Deny me sunshine and the seeds of salvation
Touch me once and I shall be newly reborn
Remember me even after from our mothers we are torn
Forget love and our date by the river
Under those stars you made me a believer
You spoke about your little girl and I wanted to make you my wife
We kissed under the moonlight of that greatest night of my life
I can hear my heart beat indecisively,
Sometimes I am such a Jerk
Unsure of what to think of
In Shadows that surround me
Till I sought out a passion
To nourish and be my Soul Food
Most of My dayz are spent
Make out who I am beneath the noise
High to the fucking gills
Sirens cry a Fantasy Opera
On that High M3 Ride to BP
Happy as fuck
I couldn’t wait to see you.
– Inspired by ASM-SAN’s Broken Hits
I’m going outside
And I don’t care if it’s raining
Mi o bi wọn leere
jẹ k’awọn ọmọde mi ṣere
I stepped faraway
To connect with the old gods
O le so nkan fun mi
Ma teriba si anybody
I feel in my element
No filter on these thoughts
Mo ma pada wa
titi di igba naa
Ke kọrin ke kijó ṣaaju ki o to
fun ogun pẹlu awọn oriṣa titun
Would you like some coffee
To go with your toast and cheese
I’m pretending not to hear
Staring at the hobo about to freeze
I put some extra cream
Is that how you…——
His blasphemy broke the daydream
But I choose not to argue
I drink and smile a little
I have a bite from my toast
Let’s have the rest to go please
Sure, it’s always nice to see you.
I’ve turned out all the lights
And i’m feeling a little blue
It’s the middle of the night
And darling i’m thinking of you
Will you be here soon
Radiant Sunshine
Beseech the green moon
To find something better to do
Love is a four letter word
That rules the world
Love is a four letter
Lethal, but you may have all of mine
The dawn is breaking in
On Sunday morning
It’s nothing and all
Save me from my falling
Don’t let it break your heart
I don’t want us to be apart
Night haunts me
Will you hold onto love
Murder, is just a kiss away
Bite me.
For second I thought
Thou must be
The most beautiful creature
In this world or any others
And for all the seconds
And years since
I’ve had very little doubt
That if one knew
How the world was governed
One would know,
That not all of beauty roams free
Even the moon, the stars
And the sun
Are bound like leaves in a tree
But compared to you
In ecstatic glee
Most else looked like pitiful tar
So I consign myself
To be a satellite for thee
That thee may give life
To me.
If I asked
What you knew of fate
You may say
It’s a door or rather the gate
That one will pass
Whether struggling or with poise
For no one can change
What was at the beginning never a choice
If I asked
What you thought
About new beginnings
You may say
Stop with the foolishness
We both know
Such things do not exist
Except in dreams
Send for the diadems
To be placed on his head
He’ll be ready once
That girl leaves his bed
Send for the maids
to water seeds
Before the sun comes out
But not more water than
the plant needs
How does the beast feed
From our thoughts when we sleep
Memories of secret deeds
That we intend to keep
Perhaps the angels are all sleeping
And heaven will not hear this
But there’s a little child weeping
Questioning creation and all of this
In all likelihood, we’re in hell she said
But don’t try to reason you way out
You’ll only keep flailing till you’re dead
Then you’ll see there’s nothing to fuss about
I’d venture a guess, but I don’t know who’s listening
And there’s clues for those who wish to find it
First, within a forest grave you’ll find treasure glistening
Lastly, the ink on the page will not blot.
Clementine knows
I think she knows
that I think she’s gold
When we were young,
Things were different.
And still she wishes to be
Like the delicate flowers
she was. Even though,
All things must have it’s season.
She tells me that sometimes,
She forgets the harder things,
So I call her heaven in my bed.
In my sweet dreams
We shared in our youth
I think I was called ‘Lucky Cody’.
When together for supper
I am just humble miner
And she was my darling,
Clementine.
It was silent
Like the graves we got drunk by
It was cold
Like the tombs we crept by
It felt like a miracle
The most beautiful sound
I’d ever heard
It was boundless
Like the ocean your mother drowned in
It was warm
Like my voice against your face
And your hand on my chest
It was sung
And i heard it somehow
Although i was deaf
It was also the first time
The world gained color
Before my very eyes
The children gather around the rainbow coloured xylophone
Singing rhymes that the teacher taught them a day ago
Holding hands circling rings around the player who was suddenly not alone
It’s a lovely memory buried in my past from forever ago
I glide through the rooms in this mind palace
Trying to retrace some steps I seem to have lost
You are the oil poured over the head of the king from the middle school play
I am the traitors cup of wine from an eventful last meal
There he was sitting on his hospital bed
Playing a video game that he got some Christmases ago
Not a care in the world that he had been dead
Maybe not more than 3 hours ago
She is convulsing at the foot of the altar
Enraptured with zeal for the ineffable
Save him lord or i may very much die as well, she cried
To all who watched, the truth echoing was palpable.
We were children circling the glorious throne
Lost in the profundity of reality
It was silent…
Echoing silence bordering on unreality.
Nameless but we knew better
And since we had all of eternity
We continued to sing and continued to dance
We continued to love as though it were our only chance
Storms break to the yoke of sunshine
We fall deeper into each other’s arms tripping on the guitarist’s blues strings
Drunk in love on something so fine
Winter caves that life may spring
So the earth yields to seedlings
We move lockstep in tune
To the words of my slow revolution
The glances our eyes steal at another
Perhaps today I should say hello
But first a very big thank you
To GS, Buddha and Alexander
How to find a, sound eagle and inner peace.
And all others who read and share and like
Tonight as I write
The wind sings into my lungs
Dusk promises to take me home
With my head in clouds I hear subtle songs
The ink speaks to me like the heart of a fire
Incantations written with the blood of Gaia
Today I rode to the fruit shop on my bike
I bought some apples, cherries and a pomegranate
Then I got a cucumber and other veggies that I like
My sister calls to remind me about the dates
Yesterday I rode to the park on my bike
But my friends said we’d walk the rest of the way
So up the fairy’s hill we took a hike
It was a truly memorable day
Love and let live
Cries the spirit of the time
Drive and take me
To the springs of ever after
Violent delights
And impassioned outcries
Of please let me go
Question marked innocence
And juvenile love
Pleasing to let me know
Catch me if I fall
Deeper into winters virgin snow
Save me from the untold
If this insanity continues to unfold
Under the covers
You lay like a beast
Who knows what goes on in that head
Your eyes fixed to the stars
Thanks to heaven for this feast
That girl curled in your bed
Love and let live
Cries the spirit of the times
Save yourself if you wish to be free
Beast or prey or whatever you may be
All I wanted was to do right
But in my passions was led into this song
And as I strayed from the light
I left you with this wrong
Of Goading the feeble-minded beast
With the hilt of your sword
Responsible for this abomination soaking our feet
The blood of those still joined at the cord
What will you pray, say
About this senseless massacre
That I have wrought upon this day
You harbinger of disaster
Do you not hear the bells tolling
For you and for me
Do you not feel hells grasp tightening
Do you still believe we are free
Someone’s going to pull me up from under
Although it might be foolish to ponder
That from the wrongs of hades and all we had mistaken,
Right will come to (battle the hordes
And with hosts) lead us to heaven
Don’t you dare
Think you can understand me now
I don’t care
And nothing can stop me now.
From another world
You can say
Be a little foolish
Right and Wrong be One and the Same.
Dissolve to become foam in the waves
Retire with me to be a sprite that saves
Lost souls searching for a home
With nothing in the world and no place to go.
Swim over me with the thirst of the sea
We are who we are and what we want to be
And although our roads were paved on forgiven sins
The walls still feel like they’re closing in.
Will you shepherd me through the wildness
And comfort me in this valley of death
Will you take care of me
Will we survive out there on the sea
It’s midday over a deep blue sky
And the smell of blossoms and flowers too
Swimming with the wind flowing by
The tree with the carved names of me heart you
It’s a melody guiding shipwrecked sailors in their doom
Struggling against the pull to the bottom of the sea
It’s the sirens song, I’ll love to see you soon
Soft hearts at rest, air bubbles looking for breath
Love, Princess of the underworld
I thought you were but a dream
You didn’t have to leave the sea
Just to be here in depravity with me
There’s not much to be learnt
About love and fate
Outside of heartbreak, death
And what you thought was freedom
In those pale blue eyes.
It’s a brave thing to know all that,
And still wish to be drunk on romance
I will leave all of tomorrow’s costume parties
High on life
With the girl in the silk gown
Will you make a bridge
Between reason and feeling
To be at peace with the truth in yourself.
Or other things be damned?
Yeah, why is that so bad?
You are the rosebuds of Golgotha
Thorns stripped away for a crown
I offer them as homage to the king
He’s crying out to the sky, but at us, he smiles down
I am the curtains of the upper room
Torn apart during an earthquake
You fold and entomb me with a carpenter
He held me because I begged, we are risen like bread.
Be my friend in this dream
And share this breath of life with me
It’s not more than it seems
Everyone gasps
When death sets us free
Will you choke the candles
After I have fallen asleep
And lay with to me on the floor
Keeping warm
Tightly till the birds sing of dawn
Guide me through the crossroads
Where the wild roses grow
To find what lives beyond
all façades
Soon we will know
All heart and unintelligible I may be
Deaf to the moans of forever in a hymn
But feeling the warmth of winter’s kiss
On morning dew
I swear to always the there for you
I saw sparks fly onto the tinder
Of this already naked mother
Slow, but exponential without rest
An inferno engulfs the forest
And the crimes we commit
No child is innocent enough for our conceit
The horrors of our hellish tendencies
Born out of utopian fantasies
Must the soul rage against itself
Convulsing in dread of what is to come
A stupendous crime to end this game
A return to the kingdom of that with no name
The clouds offer reprieve to the gaping wound
Those who survive content if the sun doesn’t arrive too soon
We’re arming ourselves for a love crime
And we shan’t stop, unto the end of time
Let’s go together to heaven
Even if we don’t know how
Man doth not by bread
But by the sweat of the brow
Let’s visit the museum
There’s an exhibition in town
Called ‘A parade of bones’
Critics call it ‘Mona Lisa’s frown’
May I touch your cheek
And whisper into your ears
Do you miss me
In that tomb of fears
Teach me how to pray
I’m terrified of hell
Who could mandate such pain
Asks Moon-burned girl
There’s a whirlwind erupting
From the depths of the sea
Is it the end or just the beginning
Of what we’re supposed to be
Don’t shoot!
My hands are up.
Don’t shoot!
Please don’t shoot.
I felt the waves weather me down,
from the peaks of purgatory
deep into the ground
is this hell, my lord i am sorry
you shook your head
saying i had a multitude of chances
and reminded me of all the times I said ‘i would take my chances’
all that i had imagined to be gold, just lead
how can i ever depart from this labyrinth
i do not need to explain morose doom
what happened to your promised boundless mercy
what do my blood and tears lack
perhaps i ask for too much
grant me, if not salvation, then repose
Merrily, rowing past, the once thought horizon
the wind in your hair, as you heartily take in breaths
we’re headed to where no man has ever been
sailing beyond the edges of this very earth
Keep your head up my darling Wendy, and smile
take no heed, to the detestable, and envious croaker
that groans of the world’s turns, just you wait a while
things always come around sooner rather than never
These places, we love, that we call homeland
the feeling tarnation of being more amongst strangers than friends
our open want to love each other in spite of arbitrary lines in the sand
and the phantom majority, gazing out through a polarised lens
Its a slow revolution, thats what i’ve always told you
these steps inch forward, though we clawback once or twice
virtues compound up in our collective point of view
the happenings will prove not to be random throws of dice
In the dream we sat, by the shore, talking next to a fire we built
and you said the whole world, feels covered with frost
how do we spread this warmth to lift the corners and create a smile
a light attracting attention that all, will be well, and is not lost.
PS. Be virtuous, seek knowledge, expand your views and when with another of same or different cast of mind, maintain and strengthen your humanity, Be Kind.
PPS. With a great big hug, and a kiss from me to you. I wish you great fortune on this journey too.
This wasn’t to be the place to spill these beans
but my darling i’m a vagabond lost
drifting alone through time and space
and everyone can see his mark upon my face
Would you, dear stranger, do me the honour
of sheathing this sword i’ll plunge into my chest
its the only thing tethering my pieces together
I’m hollow without form filled with straw
There’s something to be learnt in dying
surrendering to the afterlife’s midwife
finally watching and appreciating each breath
softly and tenderly departing from the earth
I think back to a time when I played in the sand
making angels with our limbs on the floor
oh what I would give to go back and hold your hand
will I recognise him if love were at my door
You, my friends, don’t, pay attention to this shiftless drunk
that knows nothing about the real thing
its always this or that or some other trifle
let him go gently
let him drink, hell,
let him sing
about the man he murdered out in the forest
and the baby he sacrificed to the world
now he daydreams of peace and understanding
may Pluto grant him a just reckoning
He breaths softly, tears in his eyes
licking his lips at the sight of you
Condemn him to Judecca’s ice
He mustn’t repent his life, for want of nothing left to lose
I’m breathing
I’m here and I’m leaving
I’m dying
without flair, its everywhere
somewhere over there and I’m blooming
I’m sorry
I was trying unsuccessfully to be good
I wonder what i’ll find up in these clouds
oh whoever you are
will you forgive me
I’m breathing
softly
I’m dying
softly
I’m breathing
softly
I’m living
softly
Oh, I forgot to add, I planted some magic seeds.
There’s dust on your windshield
but there you were
sitting by the five-0’s fender,
saying baby, come here
there’s a funny eccentricity
in the mathematics of my dreams
I listen to a man preaching common laws
and try to discern what he truly means
Will you join me as I raise hell
and stake your life to this slow revolution
because if we don’t, I can tell
that ours will be another lost generation
In this story of vows and rivers
that’s the same everywhere I went
this boy, all scrawny and shivers
and this girl, just wanting things to be different
Take your virgin out to the matinee
and kiss her tenderly
because boy you will never see
the girl you fell in love with so dearly
Her parents worked her up to tears
and made you a criminal in her eyes
you misunderstanding her childhood fears
did nothing to stand up against their lies
Maybe she’ll sing you a song
a rhapsody of what you shared in the dark
she’ll return the ring of love promised to last long
and finally turn her back
She ran away from it all, taking all that you had
except what you wished to give
have your heart and wedding ring back
she wept, even though she chose to leave
Its been a decade since the day
you found that note in her hijab behind your closet
she said, ‘although I don’t want to remember the U.S of A
I still love you, and my days with you were the best.’
In a letter I wrote,
‘Sharon, I’m sorry I was weak
when you needed me the most
I still believe miracles happen
these feelings are my curse and gift from heaven.
because I had confused them with what was true
and I thought this world was made especially for me and you.’
When i look out this chest to see
The yesterday of what i used to be
Searching for little love we could borrow
Watching the ripples of soon tomorrow
I feel sunshine at the rainbows end
Something you gave to me my dear friend
Flying through the sky in a calm breath
Taking in the noisy life before death
I feel your hand still pressed in mine
And i’m glad to hear that you’re doing fine
After we escaped from this house
That we slowly burnt to the ground
Your intense loving was all that I’d need
Even as this soft heart continued to bleed
I miss our pact of guileless felicity
When did you and I begin to lose trust in ‘the we’
Darling i’m lying on the moon
And i’m planning jump down real soon
Because my head is in a total mess
And waiting no longer makes sense
This monkey weighs heavily on my back
And I think i’m about to break because I lack
Mama’s sweet loving: chicken with mashed potatoes
And baby’s warm hugs, kisses and good morning hellos
Buried alongside ‘I love you so much’
And the hurt that ‘I had to leave’ behind
To fertilize this ‘new adventure’ that keeps me terrified
All over me, i’m ‘completely satisfied’
There’s a valley of God between ‘I exist’
and ‘You do too’ clouded by mist
There’s a sea of love between ‘the day we met’
And ‘till the end’, it’s ripples we soon forget
In your arms I’m lost
like a sparrow post-deluge.
And if i’m not found,
will you remember how we,
loved with our feet on the ground?
I can see your light
shining through the desperate gloom.
There’s no will in me
to put up a rousing fight.
My love know, I’ll see you soon
I recall faintly
violent dreams
and crude awakenings.
I forget feeling
a growing void
of life without meaning.
Can we pick back up
broken pieces
to repair this tea cup?
Will you be willing
to spare your gold
to mend my faults?
This quiet heart wants
sweet loving
peace and understanding.
It leans out for you
and beats gently
for a world without war
– For Marianne (and her hidden love)
This is a song
I happened across alone
The night I tried to find
a place to belong
And I heard you sing
On that microphone
This is a bar
For all the manics
Who loved heart first
accused of going too far
To quench that thirst
Here, remember, do not panic
This is about a lady
and a man
Who were willing to travel
into the depths, of human
Together forever
Or at least, until death
This is a hotel
For the broken hearted
Who just want somebody to hold
And the lost souls
of the dearly departed
Too scared to return back home
This is a home where you can be free
We don’t worry about what’s in your closet
Or if you don’t have a cloth rack
Don’t you bother your chest with secrets
Lighten the load off your back
Find the real you, and the real me
This is a song
For wallflowers in a bar
Enjoying the nightly philharmonics
This is a place to belong
And it’ll never be far
We share doobage and gin tonics
Let’s dance over the beads at night
And relish in the summers starlight
You both are gems in the wide wild world
In your glories, our souls unfurled
There I was discovering the things you know
You smiled, irresistibly engaged and going with the flow
Of gin tonic, Molly, and late night salvation
Against the odds, we met and softened into early morning conversation
You hadn’t been traveling for too long
And we never went too far
But without regaling our ears with a song
We knew you both were superstars
When the world froze for a night
And all were 4 twinkling starlights
Drinking in a bar, by the river
We spoke about a homey Italian dinner
I don’t want to begin my thoughts with ifs and maybes
but you are contradictory to my logic
maybe and if I were a better man, then I would just be
without any of the struggles of being
But that would hardly make me a man, would it?
just a machine or a god
either way, I feel you’d prefer that,
then you could use me
selfishly and unfeeling without remorse
Please don’t let these words worry you
Just thoughts that sprung in my mind
from depths I am unaware of
but I know enough that that they do not belong to me alone
so perhaps you will forgive my imperfections
for they are who I am
And I shall continue forging on
in a path I shall make mine
This is not a poem
but a confession, a secret and assertion
for the dead and the living
as long as you can forgive and love again
then it’ll all be right, because you and I know thats what we have to do
Soon they would come to round us up
to quell the slow revolutions happening in our minds
to trample on the flowers growing in our hearts
I would like to go on and on, I don’t care
I’m singing a life’s song, that I become a better man
and I know you’ll join along, and share this light air
This love for love makes me a child again
I’m foolish and learning, maybe I’m free
Will you build these castles with me on the beach
as you take a break from where you are from
on the journey to where you are headed
and if you ask for directions,
I’ll point to both sides, then up and down
and tell you we have to hurry
to where we’re going
our ambitions expanding the circle of journey
and I’ll be with you at the destination, which is where we come from
Take the first step
and the fantasies shall become real life
take the first step
and what you will find will change your life
from the depths in me erupts this message
and if you’re willing to hear it
just like i’m willing
you’ll see that we have all got so much.
It’s the merry blues
And quiet nights alone in my head
Loved by thoughts of you
Trying to get in my bed
It’s the merry blues
And memories in the lush forest
smoking marijuana with you
Someone said, those times were the best
On so many nights
If you remember the words we said
Clutching underneath starlights
The dirt and the whole earth were our bed
It’s the merry blues
And a breath of fresh air
Neither of us was bad news
But who’s objective in a love affair?
You can call me a liar
And deny once, and deny twice any claim
That your heart was ever on fire
And it was all just an expertly played game
I have only one excuse
For the scene that’s stuck in my head
And it’s the merry blues
You and I dancing, as we make your bed.
Hell is empty,
And baby its a sad, sad view.
Hell is empty
And baby, i really miss you.
I knew the costs, behind your vice
I love you, yeah, that does sound nice.
But it can be, a treacherous thing to say
A Baneful happy-ending, to flower someone’s day.
You swore up and down, to no ends
That perhaps my angels and demons, may become your friends
Maybe one of them, would understand your many fears
And reveal to you, my masked away tears
Hell is empty
And baby I’m alone.
Hell is empty
And how long, will you make me atone.
This I know is true
That I deserted heavens gates to be with you
That we may make paradise out of this barren wasteland
Or at least, this was our plan.
There’s possibilities unseen
Limitless in a distant nights sky
Above where I lay
Dreaming of you and I
The grass is brown from drought
Theres only the occasional chirp then deep silence
And tiny orbs of light from the fireflies
Earth’s Stars with a natural luminescence
I hear whispers of when we’re loved
In the depths of distant memory
I wonder what it is that we may have lost
Lapsing into momentary reverie
I welcome daylight and
whatever songs the birds are singing
It’s natures way of lending me a hand
As I stumble awake absently thinking
Do you still whistle skippy’s tune
When you’re alone drinking tea
I don’t even know what i’m talking about
You probably don’t even remember me
I know that you’re trying to catch me
But really I just want to be free
In a cage of my own making
I want to give out what I’ve been taking
There’s a song in these words
A rhythm i wish I could understand
Does this imposter wish to die by the sword
Are my castles really just made of sand
I don’t know if i’m ready for judgement
But I’ll sing the song and give it all that I’ve got
Whatever you figure is a suitable as punishment
I’ll accept it as my lot
You taught me to find the beauty in nature
And to love the flaws inherent in every tree
You showed me how to nurture a flower
And in time to let it grow free
You gave me the fluidity of the wind
That I may paint these ideas in the sky
Ahh I feel the lift in my wings
As these words join the by and by
You bled softly on what became the wolfs moon
i cried sombrely to you, your favorite tune
there’s no way to fix your broken heart in time
so i’ll give you another, have a piece of mine
Once on a clear nights sky
You told me about when you tried to die
Your sins that you never forgave
And about how you hate the bed you made
I hope you now know what I knew
And that everyday is a chance to start anew
Don’t be bound by your demons in the past
Take advantage of today, and make that moment last
There’s a little princess in your town
And she’s all on her own
You mustn’t let her down
Neither now nor when she’s all grown
There’s a little princess trapped somewhere in an attic
She’s gone from a hundred to nearly zero
And I fear she might soon begin to panic
Someone please, we need a superhero
Do you think you have what it takes
To don on the cape
Or are you just another one of the fakes
Trying for an unruly escapade
There’s a princess playing with her dolls
Ones very small, the other slightly tall
They were having tea and playing house
Until they were interrupted by a cat chasing a mouse
She met a gentleman’s monkey
That happened to sneak in through the window
She wondered gazing out of the balcony
If a saviour would come from the world below
There’s a peasant boy
Slaving away in the castle
Day and night, but in his suffering finding joy
Who heard the racket from that day
And wondered what was all the hassle
So one day when he thought he was alone
He snuck to the peak of the stairwell
And when he heard her voice his ghost almost left his bones
He tripped and down the stairs, he fell
She called out to him
Looking from the keyhole
‘Help me please, please help me’
He thought she must have been who had been using the extra food bowls
The next day while alone again
He walks up and knocks, asking:
How can I help you
Why are you up here
My father is dead
And this witch keeps me locked up here
All that is in here is a bed
And a window for fresh air
He sneaks into the mistresses room
And steals a mysterious looking key
He fits it into the lock and twists
The little princess bursts out free
The sound of a horse carriage stops their short jubilation
And they go off to the back to hide
The girl giggling with elation
As he lead the way into a pig sty
Peeking out they hear a sharp cry
And fiery smoke rise up into the sky
Suddenly they saw the monkey screeching to get their attention
He shows the way out through a back plantation
This girl ran in the direction of the brook
And stood behind a man holding a sword
She embraced him with tears in her eyes calling him father
He looks arms stretched to the boy calling him son
He puts them behind him to face the eternal adversary
Knowing that bygones do not remain bygones
He must do what is necessary
By slaying this beast of a dragon
There’s a little princess in our town
And she’s running faraway
Please don’t let her down
Give her a place to stay
She’s making up stories
From her prison in the attic
Of knights and dragons and all sorts of glories
Trying not to panic
There’s a princess in your town
She laughs thinking how I must sound
I’m going to be okay she smiles
I’ve got a knack for weaving truthful wiles
There’s a girl I saw today
Who carries herself with the dignity of royalty
She saves herself, eventually some other day
She gained mine and your loyalties
I’ll fight for this little princess
Till I’ve given up all the breath in my lungs
Give everything I have in excess
I know i’m not going to be wrong
Loving a little princess
as a little peasant boy
And being a little princess
Loving a peasant boy
As the night crept quietly over our little town
We whispered our wishes to the moon
Into a gourd we set on the river to wash down
And into the swamps of the evil forest
We heard a weeping child at night silenced by growling wolves
Teaching it early lessons of life and fate
Someone later asked how we could permit one so young to be taught by beasts
We replied that we are all the same, and nature merely aided in what we had been late to do
A little girl wishes to set sail to the edge of the world
In search of a purpose, love and the supposed meaning of her life
Her mother wailed like she was weeping the dead
While her father beamed from ear to ear
Watching his child disappear with the sunset and praying to share a sunrise with her another day
When the heretic entered the shrine
To seek wisdom and on the arts of divining
The babalawo laughed and took off his chain
They is no more in these palm nuts or in the world than what you bear in your soul
Through that mystery will you receive the wisdom of all mysteries
Return again tomorrow my son
The town crier didn’t beat his gong this morning
He’s either dead or the king is
Either way best we stay at home today
I’m tired anyways.
Today i’m going to hide a bit of what’s been going on to stay strong
Because the thoughts swimming in my head are rigid and wrong
So allow me to whisk you away on a magical adventure
To the high seas in search of some long forsaken pleasures
This garden of delights had only bioluminescent plants
Which lit up the paths as we walked restlessly searching
For something to freeze our spirits with fear till we wet our pants
I understand that my fantastical descriptions are far too reaching
I hope you’ve heard of the lion who was king of the desert
We found him when we stumbled to one of the most desolate places on earth
He was the beginning of the end of the world
Though his glory shone and caused the overwhelmed leaves to fall
He gently lay down and died in order to resurrect all
What would I like to be
And accomplish from this mission
what would change about me
From this terrifying and exciting vision
I want to see your ghost
to ask if it’s lonely and cold
with the lord of hosts
In the city of gold
If you’re happy there
I’ll consider joining when i’m old (i’ll join you when i’m old)
But just you say the word
And I’ll come storming in (and i’ll come running now)
With the foolish and the bold
To break the sheep from the fold (to join the sheepish fold)
Oblivious to the tales of old
Just you say the word
And this world will come to an end
But you won’t be alone
And the nights won’t be cold
I spoke to a native doctor
Who became my friend
The one from the story of the tortoise
Trying to get his wife pregnant
He asked that I bow my head to the floor
And before the most high be repentant
Just you say the word
And I shall gently knock on heavens door
Like a good school boy
Who knows not a thing about God
Now truth be told (-)
I don’t know what I know (and not a thing about life)
Not even what I do not know
So I adhere to wisdoms of old
And analyze whatever it is I am told
I’m drawing a map from these paths
That appear beneath my feet
I hope that we can once again laugh
At the end of this journey when we meet.
I laugh out beaming like the sunrise to a new year
There is a hidden message to be passed with subtlety and flair
I guess it’ll be shrouded in mystery for a little while
Decipher it in my dimples and my smile
The sands of time do not halt for any man
Not even for those with the best of plans
But my only option is to put pen on paper and write
And have faith that fate will shine it’s light
I took a big rest today
But I have one thing to say
Thank you
It’s been great
And it’s gonna be greater
Just you wait
Thank you
Mazel Tov and a lovely New year to you
I’m going to the bridge at midnight to admire the view
i’m scared to look down so I got high
It’s what I do to reach into the sky
It’s such a wonderful time of the year
Filled with so much hope and none of the fear
Basking in the remnants of Christmas cheer
Partying because the end of the year is near
Mazel Tov, My friend be bold
Who knows what the future holds
Let us go to he who has some love we can borrow
Because who knows, we might be dead by tomorrow.
I was handed some water by a maiden
‘A bottle of Sunshine’ she called it
It’s recommended for repose to the heavy-laden
Something to lift up the spirits
Here, have a bottle of sunshine
Hey, fill your pockets with a bit of the divine
It’s all yours and it’s all mine
A part of some grander design
Never bet against
the dice I roll
Nor ask them to forgive
the money you stole
Never knock asking
for love, part or whole
I gave so much
baring open my own soul
I kissed you like, god damn
And a baby’s first taste of vanilla ice cream
I licked you like, I want to make you my fam
You tasted even better than in my dreams
It was the heavens and the earth
And all that was in between calling
It was a man and a woman
replaying history’s first act, again i’m falling
We’ll hold on like roots to the soil
There’s nothing realer than that
And this which could make even blood boil
The gaze from your eyes is a lover’s pact
You looked at me like I was the world in one guy
And I knew I wasn’t much back then
You chocked on me as if you were ready to die
I came, rising again and again, shouting Amen
24 times a million hours
And for each second I’ll gift to you
86.4 billion flowers
That’s longer than I’ve ached to share an existence with you
Driving 60 on a heart’s runaway
Let’s love loud with 0 shame
I swear, here is where I’d like you to stay
Let’s try to play a winning game
They raced past stop lights
Half an hour before midnight
Trying to getaway from the crime scene
Looking for a place to reconvene
She had to blow his brains away
It was the only way to save the day
Now she’s panicking and blood stained
Taking a pill to keep her anxiety contained
They drive over to Ed’s to switch the car
Their journey is going to be quite far
They meet a girl and her grandfather on the run
Just wait till they find out who planted the gun…
The shepherds have gone to sleep
It’s past their bedtime
And as stars glow into night’s deep
The light means we’ll all be fine
The shepherds have gone to sleep
And although i tried to implore
They left a meadow of sheep
For whatever wolf was at the door
I heard bells ring
And a choir of birds sing
Nature really does the most
Makes you think it’s the Holy Ghost
Slowly and surely
We crawl to the ends of all knowings
Buried under dusts
Of past deeds
We lie in wait as seeds
With each reassured step
I carve out a path for a new story
That’s hidden
In the vaults of my mind
More valuable than a gold mine
(It’s an eight line poem broken into thirds)
(Read it as 3 verses, then attach each corresponding line from the verses together and read as one verse)
Queen,
you immaculate lady
I wish I believed you
about your baby
Although
the world
Call him
the son of God
Mary,
blessed art thou
Yet I do ponder
The why and how
It was done
And the innocents sacrificed
too late to realize
the giver of all life
Mother,
I know you would not lie
So I must ask
did you bare him to die?
By our hands
for our hands
We murdered God,
Now his blood floods our lands
Watching the phonograph spin
she resembles a mastermind
If this is a game you play to win
Then, i’m in quite the bind
Did you hear that?
She bursts out suddenly
It can’t be recreated,
I’ll tell you with a fact
And it wasn’t until suddenly
This world is turning in and around
And we’re going to be dancing
When the shit finally goes down
Smoke in the air
Drinking
hand in hand
Partying
Through life’s explosive torrent
Grant me this last wish if you can
Release me for a moment
So I may die a free man
Will you stand with me at the dawn
Of the new world
Will you laugh or yawn
At my idea of partying with the whole world
I’m not dizzy from the drinks
it’s your ballgown that’s put me in a trance
I’m might have fallen in love, me thinks
But all in all, thanks for the dance
You guided me in the movements
The jump, step, pinch and thrust
You said it’s something holy
Do it with someone you trust
We met again on the streets
With a guess of what the night had in store
We clawed and ripped my favorite sheets
And didn’t stop till we were both sore
The morning after I didn’t quite get your name
So i’m writing this because maybe
You kinda feel the same
I fell in love with you lady
Cheers to great nights
And a wonderful friendship
Memories made
through Sun and moonlight
The past half decade
has been one amazing trip
Cheers to more life
And I hope that
fun times never end
Headlong and strong
in our youthful adventure
With joy of uncountable measure
Cheers to the good times
Like when we rolled
Laughing on the living room floor
Caressing the tree of life carpet
Getting high and drinking
Being in the heart of life, living
Cheers to my brothers and sisters
Your indomitable will
Your passions
For what you feel
Taught me to value
The bond that we share
It’s a deep treasure
There’s a line between feeling and meaning
Show me what you’re made of
There’s an ocean between legends and believing
And no one holds a compass
You’re permitted to rest a while
Just maintain your focus
Push harder with a smile
Paying no attention to hocus pocus
Hey there
What’s your name
Oh Franca
I’m sorry, I’d hate
To missed the party
But I have work all day
And my kids have to be in bed
By eight
Heyyo
No problemo
My dear friend Jane
I hope you don’t mind
That I used
some of your photographs
to make a collage
Those were the ones I could find
You took me to heaven in the softness of red wine
and laid me on clouds to be swept away
I hope you all have a enjoy the occasion of dinning fine
tell me how you spent your day
Falling asleep in front of the wheel
Holding out through desperate measures
The dream and waking state, are both so real
Buried in both are an uncountable multitude of treasures
Blue fluorescents blink through the alleyway
where we met and fucked yesterday
There’s a schoolboy there doing graffiti
Of a lioness and an acacia in the Serengeti
This morning, your words were so alive
About how my heartbeat was a perfect metronome for your sleep
Tonight, I know will be alright
We both have our promises to each other to keep
Let’s have dinner in that rooftop bar
Where the whole of Budapest can be seen
Tell stories of our past and how we’ve come so far
Since the time we spoke about our ambitions and dreams
We’re walking a fine line
Attempting to put things right
Yeah, i’m all good and everything is fine
But it’s not when I sleep at night
There’s a god in the skies
Whose fights could split open a cloud
Sometimes a stray one or 2 humans die
When he beats his war hammer all mighty and proud
I’m trying to fill my vessel up with words
And I’ll surely hate to bore you
So tomorrow I promise to take you on a tale to a different world
I promise it’s gonna be worth it to see the view
How do we get it done
And still have fun
stop the darkness dire
Set the blaze afire
I didn’t get any sleep last night
So I started out in the bush
Because of the computer light
And incomplete Canadian kush
Do you hear me loud and clear
Bound to the starboard
As sirens sing into the air
There’s a dozen men already overboard
Hug me tight
And remember
even though we fight
That we’re stronger together
There’s a guiding light
Leading us back home
There’s a green piece alight
I puff, when it’s close to my dome
Lets watch a movie
Then drive around the town
We’ll do to each other, something groovy
And I’ll give you a crown
today i rode
my bicycle
through the streets
of my hometown
I saw veranda posts
from Ile-Ife
littering the sidewalks
of my hometown
there’s a girl
setting up shop
multiple fruits on her pan
i offered her a hand
there’s a boy
over there
fashioning totem polls
dog, tortoise, pigeon
there’s a woman
weaving mats
her children play
hide and seek
In my hometown
there’s a yellow church
and multiple forest shrines
visit them all
then i met
a man
one eye, arm and leg
he’s a god
the birds sang
from his waving staff
blessings to you he said
blessings to you
today i rode
my bicycle
to where my ancestors sleep
in my hometown
They met outside a summer party
turned midnight bar brawl
that was when they loved once
or maybe twice or thrice
dancing alone in the trance
of a melodic symphony
they knew they loved once
but i think they did twice
and all of night
was shining bright
from the look in their starry eyes
The heart-shaped cake,
from Christmas day
the softness of her voice
as they watched ballet
making music for angels
moulding together like clay
they knew they loved once
But i think they did twice
on that day
she called him love,
and he was new,
baptised
Someone said that it was doomed
that no love could survive such wounds
on the nights when she cried
Saying with a look into his eyes
my love, my dear,
comfort me with a song, so I know you’re near
they knew they loved once
i think they did twice
but everything that lives,
must someday die
dancing the days away
In a special kind of play
They took an incorrigible stand
And walked into never-never land
they thought they loved once
But I know they did twice
and forever and ever they were shining bright
they thought they loved once
But I know they did twice
forever and ever, in the face of night
Like heaven in the sky
and the rainbows up high
forever and ever they were smiling bright
and forever and ever, let there be light.
My shoes got stained with tar
During a jog, though I didn’t go that far
I took them off outside of my door
‘Cause the last thing I’d want to mess up was the house floor
I washed hard to get the stain off
So I’ll give it an afternoon to dry off
I’m not usually one to talk
But I asked if I could join you on a walk
So we spoke of transcendentals and the rule of law
Arguments justifying natural rights and it’s flaws
What a human should be and how friends are made
What it takes to be happy, forgive and the patience to be cheerful as sorrows fade
I bumped into you in a metro on the way to work
You were dressed in a white and blue pleated frock
A couple of weeks later we met in the park
We agreed to meet up for a picnic and frisbee lark
It was an engaging fun and really inspiring time
And we culminated the night with a kiss
uninfluenced by the joint or bottle of fine wine.
I got the idea from the moment we clicked
that this match was by the heavens fixed
I spent all night staring at the stars
as I strolled with your celestial body through the bars
I heard that its impossible to shine
when you spend energy throwing shade
so I’ve decided to focus on the competences that are mine
and lie in this bed in the way it is made
Today, we criss-crossed our names on that golden tree
yesterday you said you wanted to be free
well, i’m gonna be here and there
taking in deep breaths of fresh air
you decided to make that house your grave
and for that we all called you brave
what could i have done to alleviate your misery
how could we have set you free
we knew that you both grew and loved one another
thats why you agreed to live this life
like living in that home with no open doors
because he asked you to be his wife
we built all of this up from the dust
and nothing could ever bring it down
not flames, quakes or hell’s deepest frost
its the greatest thing to grace this earth’s ground
today reminds me of a time
before there were rules
when i just kinda went with the flow
today reminds me that i have
to pay my dues
its evening and time’s moving kinda slow
i didn’t rest much last night and now
i’m falling asleep
but i’m too tired to dream
so i was engaging with my brain
about good things to keep
—peace, health, family and friends—
on an ultralight beam
Bonjour mon Cher
I’ve reconciled the memories
Of years past
Loving on the beach
Fighting in the bus
And fucking on the chair
Après-midi
my lady
those train station walls can’t reveal
what you and I know to be real
the ticket lines
and kisses goodbye
Bonsoir my dear
I barely remember the story
of all those things
but i know i should have said sorry
that even when the night began to clear
I turned and left you there, not your dear
something lies beyond those clouds,
at the end of the world i’m sure we’ll find out
something hovers on in outer space
would you ever like to visit that place?
I dreamt of floating in the ocean all alone
and my thoughts weighed on me like a stone
and with each breath, i strengthened to bear the load
till my minds eye, like a diamond glowed
A sailor at the port told me
that he only felt safe and sound
or in other words free
when it was just him, with no one around
in a boat, on the open sea
and that was the last I saw of him
I was told he succumbed to the siren’s hymn
fair enough I said,
imagining what thoughts had been in his head
I’m sentimental like leaves in the fall
I ebb and flow like the waves of the sea
Taking notes so that I don’t forget it all
Writing poetry so you don’t forget about me
Father father, I wept to the priest,
My great sins have me full of fear
He said, even the lamb after the great feast
Thought his burden was too great to bear.
Rise up my child, and praise the lord of your soul
He lifts his eyes up to meet mine
Rise up my child, the love of God will make you whole
And everything will be fine
Tears drop into my tea
And reflecting in the ripple
I see you my darling, and she
Love and Life at times
can seem so fickle
To wrote this: to you
A musical prose
Of the movements in my soul
What my mouth could not say,
I suppose
It was: a quiet, longing
For a return to simplicity
I feel your agony in the depths of my sorrow
It was: a mood
dug from grateful reciprocity
I’m waiting for you my lady
On the beach in a haven
Lie with me again my baby
In the light and in the dark
And make this wasteland heaven
A Quiet (24M/13W) …Longing (20M/20W) …Mood (17M/11W) to you. (15M/13W)
blow it all up
rather than be in chains
resolve for me
the ache in my brains
windy rain washes the dirt
its our prayers to the sky
giving water to the earth
with the thunderings of a gods cry
who stole the world
and switched liberty for security
who tricked us all
here have life, but no property
cry out in the streets still you are heard
for the voice of blood rising from the earth
du pain ou la mort, we wish to be fed
du pain ou la mort, give us bread or death
So I was just writing about
being caught up in love and the game
getting hooked and strung out
getting sober and finding out
that neither of us is to blame
that loving and in love are not the same.
So I was just writing about
how we rode heroine to get by
numbing our pain away like a flood
chasing the dragon in our blood
some of us did it to get high
some of us did it to die
So I was just writing about
this time I mixed lemon with tequila
and performed kind acts of service
with a girl who had a tattoo of a chrysalis
on my way to a church during easter
yeah, sometimes i’m a bad believer
So I was just writing about
lessons I learnt from Ms. Hill’s miseducation
it shed light to some responsibilities i had shirked
and I admire the intricate beauty of her work
speaking with a voice verging on pure perfection
unsullied wisdom directed to all generations
Everything means nothing
he said after their first fight
Let the day shine on your loving
But get it out of my sight
I might be coming down with something
She tells me over the telephone
I have some medicine i could bring
if you’d rather not be left alone
She swayed in her step, so elegantly
bare footed, unabashed and smiling radiantly
she spoke some words to me in solitude
it was of some undying gratitude
I’ll be a mirror for you
just reflect on me the things that you do
somedays it’ll be about rain or life on the road
other times, you can just use me to lighten your load
you’re a creation full of compassion and grace
being around you always gets me high
I know every time we meet and I see your face
i fall deeper in love with the gleam in your eye
Even the tiniest sentiments would mean the whole world,
she said in their last fight
just wrap me in your arms i don’t wish to be impearled
we loved good, but we’ve got to learn to love right
What does it mean to care for the world and be overjoyed
And where will you be when the final bell is rung
who is the one and how do we even begin to fill the void
And when shall the saints depart in song
The why of it all escapes me
Because you see everyday I struggle with the question of what it means to be
The immense suffering, present in it all
Conscious that the spirit of subtle resentfulness was what brought about the fall
I watched your eyes light up
And the corners of your mouth lift into a smile
The elegance in your speech and the way you walk
I’m completely enthralled by your style
Will you save me from the fiery pit
For the one good thing that I ever did
or will I go mad in this place I sit
pull me out if god bids
I have to leave home,
to find a dragon to slay
Will you give me a kiss
(like when we were alone)
If I am able to save the day
today i read about a wretched victim
of what some called divine judgement
they say he was a dirty heathen,
and that the bereaved deserve no consolement
the man on the moon
came today to see you
he returned after playing me a sweet tune
And left behind pictures of the wondrous view
we’re speeding on the road
on our way to Ed’s
the old man reeked of moonshine, and safely in the land of nod
nodding and mumbling, red means dead, red means dead
i was speaking to this babe from the choir
it was midnight and we were at the bar
i misquoted a line from the gospel and she called me a liar
but she helped me fill the vacancy in my car
I can’t blame you for leaving, if you felt in pain
i saw you in a dream and it got me thinking
that could it all have been in vain
i tear while you dance, and i walk away
i am beginning to suspect, the heat of love
involves sustained friction of hearts
but thats more pain than fitting into you like a glove
like monkeys holding a wrench, screwing the wrong parts
bubbles pop, volcanos blow
geysers shoot up, streams and rivers flow
i wouldn’t choose one over the other
because i think they all serve a higher order
so i was thinking, to join you dancing
In the peaks and valleys, to the darkness of mines
it’s too late, you told me crying
I understand what you mean, the blame is all mine
I promised you, i’d be there
and in my struggles, i was fatally unclear
while you wandered about keeping time
becoming another’s business, no longer mine
I’m tired of excavating the past
Dwelling on things that didn’t last
I believe I got what I deserved
For bad habits, I have to unlearn
I’m turning on inner lights
Trying to find my soul
Across days and nights
Working to become whole
I wrote to stay alive
As I drifted through the seas
You helped me survive
By giving me more love than it seems
You wore a beautiful dress today
And I only just thought to say
Someday, I want to hear the voice of your heart
And ask you for permission to be a part
I sometimes doubt if I could change
Or that i’m still caught up in old ways
I cast away distress as I turn the page
I put one foot in front of the other, and take it day by day
With you i’m lost
in lands unknown
you, my oasis in hell and frost
take me in your wings
you bird of paradise
take me, take me some place nice
i sat all day at the market waiting
for someone to buy these trinkets you made
At last, they came, the carpenter and his maid
is there something promised that I’m forgetting
I have to fix this lifeboat that’s leaking
Tell me we’ll be fine
i feel my sinews strong tonight
vitalised by every second she smiles
she’s miles away, many many miles
Can we be alone once again
And learn in solitude
Will you call me an old friend
And look back in gratitude
Imagine you were a master carver
Trying to find life in dead oak
Or perhaps you were with friends in the forest
Finding god behind the toke
I don’t want to go to outer space
If it means we’ll be reckless over here
I can’t think of a better place
Than wherever you’ll be near
Will we grow in grace
And laugh at our youthful foolery
Nothing but peace on our minds
With our hearts light and merry
What does it mean to be alive
I struggle to answer unpretentiously
Some say it is to be found in strife
Others say lounging on a beach next to the sea
She used to think, that you would be my wife
I used to think how lucky I would be
You became determined to prove us both wrong
So you smashed about this house and walked away from me
I laughed and I cried
Then I thought, this time
That the meaning is found in life
As long as you voluntarily go on this journey (ride)
Between the peaks and valleys
Above skies and beneath the seas
It’s the unchanging and will be there beyond and till
You have drank from its fountain and had your fill
No one wants to change the past
So they walk on
Thinking old things will last
But like snakes skin, before you know it, it’s gone
How does one tame animal spirits
How do you call the eagle or the dove
I’ll summon through the energy of my heart beats
And pray I receive strength from above
I hope it’s not too late
to ask for some directions
to the night bus on Tulip street
I hope it’s not too late
you don’t know, i waited 3 hours
apology accepted today, but not again
it’s just the right time
to meet someone new
this girl told me she liked the shirt we made
it’s just the right time
to exorcise this heavy toll
and reveal the richness of my soul
We know it’s past the time
for goodbyes and false smiles
attention: heart break, clean up, all aisles
We know it’s past the time
so you can keep saying whats been said
i couldn’t give a crap, i’m going to bed
You are the plaintiff and jury
I’m the executioner’s punishment
in all it’s fury
be merciful in judgment
In love with how the details sound
Remember who legislated our game
Violence and peace were options on ground
But anger poisoned our brain
This is gibberish
What the crickets tell me before I slumber
So I lay on my bed and think of sheep
Hopping, so I count their number
I’ve sat in contemplation for long enough
To know that there’s no lasting reward in acting tough
I’d rather be as soft as a new born
Who was never, from his mother torn
I gave a dime to a blind woman once
She held my hands and blessed me
I wept and thought, how much I act like a dunce
Taking with levity what a gift it is to see
The first time we kissed was in an elevator
Outside the library, opposite the front door
The last time we fought was on the football field
I tackled, you punched, neither of our wounds healed
Somewhere in the good book there’s a passage
About all the riches in the world, not being worth a human soul
But I think some parishioners misplaced the message
Because they proselytize for the idols: silver and gold
I was once, for years, a slave
I was a captured though accidental stowaway
This is the story of how I was saved
And how I met the man who would be the king someday
I made a carrot cake
But I still don’t think I can bake
I don’t remember how I did it
Because I was baked from the first minute
I wrote a different story yesterday
About the happenings of a dream I had today
I haven’t replied to the publishers mail
Because I’m still working on the epic fairytale
I said a prayer for the earth
As I watched this child’s violent birth
I saw a mother’s pain give way to joy
As she shed tears for her little boy
I set forth to combat disorder
As I cast my treasures to Davy Jones’ locker
I dreamt of satellites and space cars
As I navigated the seas by way of the stars
We shed tears while the waves beat the shore
For we knew we were at the edge of something much more
We shed tears gazing into the dawn
For the one with us who could never hold his son
We were sailors in search of intangible gold
We were men following the tales and legends of old
Becoming that man who walks his final mile
Greets his death as he did his life, with a smile
A vagabond knocks softly on your door
‘hey baby come outside and have some more’
we’re bitter inside but pretend to be sweet
because a pyrrhic victory is worth more than defeat
A libertine king fills up my bags
as I kiss his rings and promise to come back
to him, the pearls and our mansions in the sky
then I found love and the resolve, to not return a lie
I bore out my soul as much as I could
and if you only knew how much it took
perhaps I was selfish, to think you would want my load
but i thought you understood what it was like to implode
do you remember screaming at me to go away?
you ignored the cracks, even the look on my face
do you remember later asking me to stay?
we played a losing game, but at least we ran the race
i’ll leave a crack in the door, but not to be a lover
I’m just thankful that you and I grew, and nurtured one another
so this is my way of asking, that we put differences aside
and not shun what good we built, in the name of pride
I’ve seen heaven’s myriad shades of blue
That it’s lords may tell me what to do
I was asked to minister in hell
For the salvation of those souls that fell
From the moment I crossed it’s border
I was catapulted into the infernal disorder
it sounded like a ghost was speaking to me
‘hello’ it said, ’can you hear me, please set me free’
take my hand
till one of us must go
to the idyllic land’s
garden plateau
draw the clouds
upon the sunset
the thunder speaks so loud
my soul is bereft and my cheeks are wet
will you love and keep me
sound in this eternal dream
i’m so afraid to no longer be.
how this earth weighs so heavy on me
I still remember the very day
And it causes me to say
I sensed on that train, when you said hi
I would never muster up a proper goodbye
We were reading the same book
Titled ‘love and journeys in the after’
I got caught up in the hook
I’ll be waiting for you in the next chapter
He looked in delight
At the sight of his newborn child
Hearing it’s mild cries
Echoing through forest and into the skies
It’s mother cooing sweet prayers in its ear
And her mother wraps the babe in cloth
If you need me, I’ll be over there
She then kisses her grandchild and strokes her hand through its hair
The child grew up to be strong and wise
So much so that elders sort her for advice
She gathered herbs and tilled the lands
I recall her father saying she was worth more than 5 able hands
Her story is one that belongs to another day
So I apologise if you are disappointed by the delay
But just yesterday she begat a child of her own
And I must go pay my visits and welcome my great-grandchild home
In time immemorial i searched for gold
and for so long it was beyond my reach
now i’m a man, who might seem way too old
but i assure you, there’s something i can teach
about the lessons i learnt in yesterdays
from the friends who righted my way
Firstly, be cheerful and be kind
your most valuable asset is your mind
envy and vainglory are the evils of the soul
avoid them if you ever wish to remain whole
also be sure to carry out your duties reliably
always be grateful and treat others respectfully
stay simple, the wisdom of old is valuable treasure
if you love your neighbours and friends, your reward will be beyond any measure
have compassion, and always forgive
your hands can only receive after they have been stretched to give
work hard, make mistakes and learn
be cautious about what you cannot discern
teach others what you know
That preserves the wisdom of old
I want to look at you
Maybe even hold your hand
and watch you all the while
Oh, t’was a heavenly view
Sitting on that hilltop playing with sand
You were an angel meditating with a smile
It’s the radiance of gold next to coal
The way your eyes shone into my soul
I was wrapped in lonesome blues
heartbroken with nothing else to do
Then you spoke of love, time and space
The labyrinth between inferno and the promised place
It imprinted on me a glorious bind
I lose unhappiness, when you’re on my mind
It’s a blessing seeing you sway to that song
Our fingers kissing, but never for too long
I know I could set things right
If I pave my way with heavenly starlight
Lift you with these words, way up high
I’ll be your happy loving bluebird, can’t I?
Your mellifluous voice in my ear
Whispering to me ’my dear
embrace me with your arms like a bow
and leap beyond clouds and over rain…ohs’
I know hearing this might be hard
But honey, I want you so bad
Just to make you smile
Even if it’s just for a little while
…
A. fantasy I wrote while thinking of you.
I never met your mother
but i was in love with her beauty
the purity of madness that shone in her eyes
and the half of the world that i saw in her smile
i never met your mother
that goddess of the hunt
she was wild and free like no other
Hellish beauty with an angelic front
years before the plague, she happened to me in a dream
kissed my cheek and said:
though things aren’t always as they seem
keep this memory of me in your head
i never held your mother
and she never embosomed me
I know, we will be together
Till then take care of her baby boy,
Someday, I hope to, too.
they said,
to love you is to die.
i read their lips as i rose my wrists
to hug your knife,
dead.
you said,
i’ve searched the world far and wide,
you were all i was hoping to find.
but now i’m thinking,
maybe you lied.
i said,
i would always be there
and i promise to love you till the end
well, the end is here
and the promise is like the love
and the love is like this song
broken
maybe i could repair my heart
and mend this trust
to be a better man
to be a stronger man
the one she knew me to be
the one i know she would want me to be
you said,
do the things now for yourself,
though you are only alive because of she.
now she’s gone,
you’re gone
and I have to live on,
for me, our promise of love, and she.
She’s utterly and heartbreakingly beautiful
In the simple kind of way
The way she chooses her words and the stride in her walk
She was the star on which I would pray
I’m imperfect and brokenly affected
And this is what I had to say
break me and remake me
I’ll be yours, loving and to love everyday
She shapes the ground I dance around
Pneuma of magic at night, Golden Starfire by day
make me like you, to be ,as one ,as is with two
tell me the magic words, angel, teach me how to pray
tell me, how does a person feel alive? (what does it mean to feel alive)
She smiles coyly and replies:
The answer you seek lies beyond any meaning
Always remember that you have to die
Show love and kindness to one more person
So that maybe in their eyes you will see it
or like you did for me, hold their hand
and maybe, just maybe, you will feel it.
In the eyes of God’s gift
The Tiger Looked Just As Beautiful As You Do
Although I Would Argue
To My Dreaming Mind, And My Waking Eyes
That Its Carnal Eyes Spoke True
I Was Unsure, You See
I Had Run In Shame And Fear
Somewhere Between Lust, Magic And Suicide
Backpedaling And Lonely, I Wish You’d Appear
I Saw A Painting Yesterday
Of A Garden I Used To Live In
And The River You Had Playfully Called The Sea
And The Path We Would Walk In
I Want You To Take This Chest
And Weigh It Against A Feather
After My Little Death, And Tell Me Whether
Your Little Death Will Keep Me Alive
Forgive Me, I Speak In Jest
At The End Of The Dream, I Stood For You, A Leap Away
Drinking Water As You Approached
You Made It Known That I Was Your Friend
And You Let Me Stroke Your Fur…
Just Then I Become A Lion
And Feel Your Hand Run Through My Mane
I Feel Your Claws Caress Against My Paw
And I See Your Smile In My Eyes
Gazing At Your Carnal Eyes,
Forever Impressed On The Insides Of My Mind.
Tell My Mom I’m Sorry
Some Of These Dreams Whither Away
And Like The End Of A Winter’s Tale Or Summer Story
It’s Me And You And Our Knitted Connection In Disarray
Find My Brothers And Tell Them I’m Gone
That I Got Lost In The Woods
I Met A Woman And She Had A Cradle,
I Promised To Be The Father Of That Baby
And Thats Why I’m Not Coming Home
Tell My Father I Engraved His Message In My Chest
And That I’ll Let My Son Know, Or My Daughter
That There’s A World, Not Like The One You See
And With The Right Approach, You Can Achieve Your Dreams
Remind Me In Future Days, That We Got High Together
That We Played Silly Games On Each Other
That We Prayed To Something We Hoped Could Hear Us
On The Road, Far From Home, Just A Couple Of Souls
Searching To Become Whole
Slap The Truth Into Me
Maybe Grab My Hair Too, Until My Scalp Bleeds
Remind Me That There’s Some Good In The World, And All Is Not Lost
Remind Me That All The Love We Feel, Is Definitely Worth The Cost
Tell My Mom I’m Sorry
Because I Didn’t Know If She Would Listen To Me
And That I Loved The Way She Brushed My Hair And Tucked Me Into Bed
The Stories She Read To Me Created This Palace In My Head
You Know This Already
But I’ll Reiterate This Again
Let Your Friends Know That They Mean The World To You
And Tell Your Family You Love Them.
—.Tell My Mom Her Boy Misses And Loves Her, Everyday.
He Has Since He Was A Part Of Her,
And He’s Grateful For This Love
Now That She’s A Part Of Him.
Something makes me wander across the stars i find in your eyes
sometimes at night i fantasise about that evening on the river side
you wore that pink summer dress you said was your moms
and I
I was hopelessly in love with the look in your eyes
I’d write an epistle about the hunger the loss of you makes me feel
it’s called body without a soul,
a bear with no hide, and a wolf with no bones
but alas the water flows, from the lakes into the homes
and I
wonder how it is that even now, you are so real
these trees grow from the love in you
and these roots sink to the hells in me
I hope the fruit is blessed and leaves stay evergreen
longing, softly and strongly
to not be stirred from this violent dream
I listened to your visions, the light intense in your eyes
the colour flushing in your smile
our souls locking and unlocking,
it’s not lost at all, just a piece of me you’d have to carry with you
and I
carry a piece of you in me
shall we compare our gods, our love, fears and hate
you told me about things such of: power and fate
where we come from and why we are here
and what happens before we are born and after we die
Oh how i do enjoy being lost wandering across infinity in your eyes
The rain fell to wash away
the blood from the streets, at the end of the day
past the point of no return
things would never be the same again
we are burning incense to the heavens
that the most high hears our cry
let the world rejoice once more in the light
lets unite the world, if just for a night
the pendulum swings and the sun sets
rivers purified with the blood of the dead ~~ (life of the young)
is that a home or just where i’m from
i, like you all, want someplace to belong
– memorial day 20/10/2020
Maybe if i keep digging i’ll find gold
or maybe i should just give up,
and do what i’m told
who would be held accountable
for the bloodshed that would water the dirt of our land
God again? the devil again? the outsider?
or the other guy?
i present to the jury last year’s man
or the man in the mirror.
i present to the jury, me
and you, and you and you
and the whole lot of yous
we are slowly and briskly losing what makes us real
what makes us feel
we are trapped in bubbles, in echo chambers
and our order is twisted
nature is coming to visit
and to her left are heaven’s hosts…
and to her right are the hordes of hell…
heaven protect those
who seek to promote love peace and unity
i hope we can come to an understanding.
It hurts to not be able to write
It’s weird that we’ll never again fight
I’m glad, I spoke those words few
Those words that I love you
And I can feel(hear) your heart in my chest
I can still feel my head on your breast
I have for many years doubted that the world was just
I find repose in the thought, all is not lost
There’s a pause in the air
God holds his breath
I know you’re now in the right place
Behind my closed eyelids I see your face
I’ll see you again tomorrow (I’ll be with you tomorrow)
When I float through the bardo
We have inexhaustible love to burrow
Our fuel to heaven in this boat
that’s what it sounds like
nothing we’ve known
the truth it seems emerges from
something we’ve never seen
To be quaint and frank,
I feel no pain
but I do acknowledge that my arms are tired
From digging this grave
When will I get to sleep in my bed
and transcend this earthly flow
How else can I be left alone in my head
Than to rest six feet below
Does it confuse you to see ink and blood on the same page
Does it concern you to imagine
faux reproduction of the insane
the soul is the scene, the world is the stage
There’s no more sorrow
The lamb has been slain
For us, it’s a won revolution tomorrow
If we allow peace and Love to remain
I’m no longer at a loss for words
I want to say we’ve been betrayed by leaders
But we’ve betrayed ourselves worse
the hate is so ugly, and it’s a fire
Why do we fuel it
Why do we not starve it’s desire?
No more -isms , just men living free
To all those with answers I ask this.
To be, or not to be?
Candy asks me to stay down
And I know you can guess why
to make her moan and explode
To make her see fireworks in the sky
She keeps me up
With her fantastical daydreams
Feeding me her nectar so I stay alive
If you read between these lines, it’s a lot more than it seems
Her tongue wrapping my own
Now we were locked in godly embrace
What’s the opposite of alone?
Her eyes rolled to the back of her face
Okay, enough talk of deeper things
She had the universe in her mind
Maybe we were just at the right place at the right time
But she was all I would hope to find
Candy stares me down, as we spoke about sustainability and the future
She puts my hand on her breast to feel her heart beat
What do you think? she asks
I put her hand on my chest, this is yours to keep
It will soon be alright, I know you know
I shiver when she kisses the tip, I cry when she blows
Boy, the way you use your tongue, and the way you write
She said I know you’ll fuck me right,
but like you did with that Candy girl,
love me tonight.
I think it’s the way the divine leaks from your eyes
That moulds my heart into becoming your wings
I didn’t trade the moth for a butterfly
So for you, I became just like all the other things
I tattooed words to my heart
Those weren’t enough
You say fall back into place
And tattoo those words on your face
I’m picking up the pieces that I can find
Of my heart that the glue didn’t bind
It’s a lot bigger than it used to be
I appreciate the love you gifted me
The beginning was unexpected
But the end was premeditated
We danced around the edge of the sword
It’s a death I wasn’t sure we would afford
You’re with them now, and I hope you’re glad
We’re on a quest to find our own
That’s the remedy for a love you said was driving you mad
I wrote to survive being alone
Through it all I smile and try to
assess who is and is not my friend
Even though just for a while, I pray for you too
I pray true love finds you in the end
I have this eerie memory of a fairytale
maybe you can tell it to me again
how did it end?
who was the hero of this story?
I remember that the princess slayed the dragon,
and that just the beginning.
I had the strangest dream last night
the taste of human flesh still reeks in my breath
what became of us, the wizards of Babel?
why is it that i wished to die?
I remember that I relished in the feast,
and the act of killing, we called nature.
I have silent reveries about a slow revolution
but someone wakes me up
Is it already too late?
did we jubilate and rave while they stole our souls?
I remember that I have friends who hope to be a change,
and tomorrow is nearly yesterday.
You wrote me to stay strong.
You said do not give up.
You asked if I was happy,
and if I missed you.
I wrote you about my fears and said ‘Thank You’
I said yes and yes and added that ‘I love You’.
The hero was an amnesiac
a beggar and a king
the fairytale was told before it began
trapped in forever and never
the end so far
to live happily ever, even after.
She tasted like the last puff of a cigarette
already used
but who am i, but a beggar
with no right to choose?
she wrote french love notes
and wore lilac in her hair
beaconing for a lover
who was no longer there
he played her for fiddle strings
but it sounded like a harp
this and that, this and that
the melodies of the heart
i stood and watched
my cup aside
listening and waiting
to see what the fates decide
o filthy son of poverty
graceless and depraved
if you do not make for yourself a home
you make yourself a grave
if only i could comprehend, what had been said
and not ask for it, to be repeated
if only you goddess, take my weary head
and make your bosom for me, a bed
it wouldn’t be home
and only i would know
few men choose when to die
fewer still do it alone
she tasted like cherry cola
and marijuana
I am a beggar, loving her still
fighting for a right to choose
what do i have to lose?
Last night we talked and we fucked
But that was just a dream
Tonight I wrote and you read
Those quiet thoughts I never said
Like how I love to give you head
Last afternoon we made love
Because that’s all it is with you
In every second of each moment
Just staring and smiling
Talking, walking and loving
And there’s a conspiracy to keep us guessing
In your world and in mine
How this dance will go
But it doesn’t matter
I always love you
I saw happiness and pain your eyes
as i confessed the truth to a multitude of lies
I saw horror become beauty’s disguise
I saw the day love finally dies
I saw my flaws and your flaws laid bare
we promised for each other to always be there
I mentioned that you are heaven sent
and i hope true love finds you in the end
I saw you practice how to disappear
escaping and denying your many fears
I saw you from the moon in that ivory tower
I saw night give way to dawn’s golden hour
I saw you watching over me as I slept
I saw you radiant mere hours after you’ve wept
I for once saw into your soul all too clear
it’s the greatest view from over here
There’s an umbrella in the attic
I call it love and peace
there’s a painting on my wall
I call it blue and green
Another cliche
Poem of you
and me
and distant earth’s view
There’s a meadow and there’s a tree
A cradle and a coffin
A fountain and a maiden
love in real world
Another reckoning I must endure
I finally understand the writing on the wall
Although at first obscure
It’s about me and none of you all
There’s a piece of a mask floating in the river
A cross and a child
A light to pierce tehom
Jesus and a girl
I miss you more than words could possibly say
as often as i remember your smile
I miss you everyday
except the occasional once in a while
but then i’ll say, your eyes look precious under the sun
as we stared into each other souls
that’s what they call love, and surely it’s fun
achingly whole … and not alone
I miss what might be the ghost of you
what could, and could not be
I miss infinite and your adieu
I miss the bondage that I had called ‘free’
the multitude of words today is a big fat lie
except that i miss you as if i could die
I struggle to write rhymes about happy times
I want to explore what it truly means to die
And I mean this, death in all its glory
A funeral where no soul lets out a cry
A cremation for the sake of dignity
For my body to experience the scorching flames
Which my soul would not in the everlasting
Christ
I want to go through the motions of my everyday
Sleep wake, pray bake
Go to school late
Write or at least try
Fall in love, so I can break my heart and cry
Stare with starry eyes and an open jaw
At how easily you’d point out all my flaws
But still say you put your trust
In me
A guy that refuses to eat the pizza crust
And I feel you’re amazed about how I speak to you
As though you are a thousand people at once
As though my thoughts are way beyond these words
These words of love
These words of God
These words are a struggle
A delightful strife we all call life
Edging closer and closer to a release that sets us free
The kiss of death
As glorious as the breath of life
As odd as the way your eyes pierce mine
Maybe that’s all that life is
The way this energy flows between us
The way you felt something when I told you,
“I struggle…”
The way you respond,
“I do too,…”
In this simulation, I’ll be a fool everyday
And I’ll say
“I understand”
Hoping, just a little, that you will tell me
“Me too”
That movement, of snow sliding down the mountain
And your heart, pounding in your chest
Of a baby being born and a lamp to the slaughter
To your favorite coffee shop and your growing cancer
All is one
All is God
I’m not going to say I love you
Because I can’t control that I do
But if you know me as much as I know you
Maybe you will never know
And that is the truth
I hope you find this
Buried deep in my thoughts
I’m mad, but it’s not a problem
Because at least i’m not sad
Oh God I pray, that you make me strong enough to survive and be joyful each day.
Oh God I pray, that you hear me speak these words.
Oh God I pray, that you cherish my friends and my family.
Oh God I pray, that you bless this planet that we live in.
Oh God I pray, that you Remember me on the days I’m weak
Oh God I pray, that I can continue to write out my emotions
That i don’t give up
and that i don’t forget God,
That I always Remember,
and that you never Forget. Amen.
***Whispered Prayers
Would you even notice if I stole some of your happiness?
Would you even notice if I said I ‘burrowed’ it? just for a little while
Do you even see me standing on your window pane at night
I’m the same size as the spiders crawling in your heart.
Do the sounds of the sirens scare you?
It’s almost midnight
Will you open the blinds to look out?
Will you see me finally smiling across the street?
Would you wave at this stranger looking at you because you recognize this face?
Be honest, will you let me get away?
Will you tell the police you never saw my face?
Will you tell them you don’t remember my name?
Do you even remember?
The song I sang?
About a time I was in Moscow?
About how you looked different but beautiful knowing I could taste your makeup with each kiss on your cheek.
Do you remember I spoke about being enlightened?
I’ve learnt a lot since then
That i’m stupid and that i’m dumb
And that man should never play God?
Do you remember how I looked across the road before I took of?
The tears in my eyes or the blood in my mouth from biting my tongue to not scream that ‘I am sorry’?
Do you remember the castle we built next to the beach?
Our kingdom, our paradise.
How we had dug it up from underneath the first snow of the season
How I had shared with you everything that had touched my soul
After that heist with all the love that we stole.
I drenched my half in petrol and lit it.
And it hurt so much to look.
Have you ever seen a melting heart?
I had begged you not to cry,
And I let you weep into my chest when you couldn’t hold it in?
Would the sun ever shine like it used to?
Will the night be less dark?
Will the unicorn I rode return to me?
Will the Lilies becomes Roses with my blood?
Will my flaws haunt me till I’m in the grave?
Do you even remember your flaws?
Of course not,
You filled a hole, but grew
Blossoming like the Cherry Blossoms I write about so much about
Then withering like a Rose in Stockholm’s cold storm
I’m sorry I couldn’t bless you with my patience.
You looked in Peace, how I probably caused you sleepless nights
how I never did everything possible.
Maybe one day, after legions of actions
After I’ve crossed seas and been buried in ash
After I’ve crawled from the dust and beneath the sand, I’d find this memory deep in my chest.
This memory that wasn’t real
This memory that never happened
Of a starry night
Heavens lights
And An angel and Devil
That fell in love.
When it’s hardest for them to cope!
When they want to disappear!
Why do they bleed slowly?
And sink away into a thought of a bleak tomorrow?
So that they grow!
And the scar tissue hardens
Stronger than bones
That even sticks and stones
Are comparably soft
And brittle to touch
Why then do they cry?
For they do not see yet, their tomorrow
And do not see their wings!
Or hear the birds sing!
“The moon is gone
The sun is rising
It’s golden hour”
She deserves to smile
For what was, is gone
And she shall create what will be.
Not with a whimper
But with a bang
She will fly high again
With a smile
Wipe tears
Forget fears
Sip warm liquor
And contemplate on your rigors
None of it will be in vain
I’m falling asleep now (writing) on this night train
But promise me this.
That you dream happy thoughts
And in morrow time when I ask what happened
And why you had seemed so somber…
You cheer gleefully
And say
you forgot.
I hope it gets better swiftly .
Sincerely Yours,
A messenger of good tidings.
Happy
Happy
Happy
Gone away
Left alone
What happens when they are sad
How do they overcome
Howe do they believe
What makes them feel
Whole
Complete
Not depressed not mad
Not sad
Crying
Breaking
Aging
Facing the changes
Living with no life
Living and taking in each stride
Neglecting spiritualism and pride
Blind to all the hate
They face, alone
Alone
I’m going to draw a heart
With a knife
Pushing deeply as I start
Allowing the warm blood to flow down the scars that tattoo my arm
I’m sitting in a bath
Soaking my sorrow
Through desolate memories
Of not wanting to see tomorrow
Black
Dark
Deconstruct the illusions in your life
And let the truth sink
Let it distort your core and your joy
Let it soak in the light and leave you without your shine
Like a jet without fuel
High and dry
Falling from the sky
And in your inner most castle walls
Just across the palace gates
Hungry babies eyes
Gaze
And you want to love and nurture
But as you feed
They choke, and with tears in their eyes they die
In your arms they rot
You’re glued to the spot
Bright lights flashes
I’m laying on my back
Yet standing along the corridor
Watching as they wheeled my body across the hospital
I was pale like a ghost and I wasn’t moving
They covered up my art, to stop my blood flowing
And frantically tried to restart my heart, to keep my body going
They didn’t find a pulse and neither could I
I have misplaced it years ago, when I replaced my body with soap
And my bones with ropes
My blood was tears and all my mind was fears
I had put flowers in my chest, and willed them to grow,
thinking it could maybe rejuvenate my soul
But it didn’t and I knew that I would not survive
So I tried to trick my mind,
And tell my fears a lie
That when the flowers die and warm waters flow.
I’ll make myself a new heart to make my body glow
Happy and Healthy
Alive and Awake
Coffee and Vodka
Lattes and Mocha
Time and time again
Smiles breaks gloom as sunny skies bring light to day
And shines so much that night is bright
Glasses and water. Reflections ripple
And reveal
An us that cannot feel
An us that can only see
What is out of its cage
An us lost in our eyes
A fragmented people
A shaken world.
An us that dreams of sunny skies and still waters
That hopes we remain in this blissful youth
That we lie in the sound
Under the sun
Dreaming of love
From dawn to dusk.
And under moonlights and starry nights
We gaze into Gods eyes
And ask if the he made us
Or if we made him
If he has a plan
Or if we’re too much for him to stand
Ask him about our love
And if it’s ever enough
If it will be in vain and tear us apart
Or if it’ll last forever and transcend beyond time
We inhaled each other’s atmosphere
A bit of each other’s universe
You penetrate me
As I penetrate you
Our consciousness intertwined
As we become one
We are love
We give love
We see God
Floating around in all of you
In all of me
As we
Escape our mundane existences to become light beings
And you,
Held the cardboard to paradise
And fed me ambrosia
Filled my heart with ichor
That we may be greater than what is to come. And all that has been given
We fold around a core.
Where we can shape my heart, your heart.
Chain me down and
Deconstruct my parts
Let me envy your entity
And think less of your ethereal beauty
Let me remind you that even in an intoxicated state
I can drive you further into confusion because I speak to you
I don’t know you, but you know me
Let us bask in eternity
Eons we create with our minds.
As we explore cosmos
Trying to figure out who is you and who is me
We journey through day and night
Through entity and nothing
Transcending over existence and in existence
Break your heart and breaking mine
We have nothing left but each other
As we dissolve into our bodily fluids
And unite in passionate cries
And I knew you knew
When you asked
How are you?
Sadly
Sadly
We are trapped
I am Frightened
I am Frightened
Without a map
Be happy
Be happy
And please stay
With me in
With me in
This labyrinth, for one more day
Do you feel your heart racing
as she squeezes your hand in hers
and when you kissed
did you feel the trigger in her tongue?
I could smell the powder
as she whispered in my ears
and even when she bit on the lobe
saying, baby do not fear!
Did you think you were all she had?
She’s more than that!
Stronger than you, stronger than me!
stronger than what you thought she used to be
she was never broken, not for a moment
and she’ll never forget
every gift builds the armour she carries
from every person who filled her chambers
For the bullet you gave
when you promised her your love
spread the word
a girl is a gun!
I’ve given you everything that i have and more
fall into line
you know that i love you
you know that i care
i may not speak these words to you
just know i’ll always be there
and may not think the sentence of me
ingenue
let me be your foolish love
let us bask in the forbidden knowledge
not from the fruit that man possesses
not with any of the good
not with any of the evil
not with any of the suffering
you know the truth
you smile as you read these words
you know i speak to you
be ingenue, i plead
give me more time
to show that i am worthy
i am not perfect
and i need an angel by my side
i need you with me
i want you to care about me
to give me the time of day
to look at me and smile
to be filled with joy not disgust
and we will reminisce in future days
of when i’ll play with you hair tomorrow
Sell your clothes
and go out in the cold
another of the mistake
like i was told
change my mindset
make me dream of Illinois
but sing me to sleep in the Chicago streets
then run me back to Brooklyn
tell me, i reek of cigarettes
and that i’m too drunk to be sound
but hey, the night is not over yet
i’m not just some bitch you can walk around
i put on my lipstick
and a layer of makeup to hide behind
maybe i’ll look out of place
buti know you’ll like this face
this is not my daydream
and it doesn’t feel like a nightmare
i’ll look and still not find it
a reason not to stay under you rain
’17, thats the magic number
the year i found you
’21, the year i was most grateful for
when i wasn’t fun enough for you
now i’m an art angel
dress me up in feathers
let me be the your masterpiece
while i wear the trashiest shit
i weep lightening
but my thunder isn’t loud enough
you tell me to take a pill to make me numb
you only like me when i’m naked and dumb
Cherry blossoms fall to the earth
and you smile with every passing breath
the earth remains the same like an endless stream
we’re forever trapped in my cigarette daydream
I look every night through my telescope
wondering how the future will be
but i have eternal hope
just knowing i have you with me
i’ll take you into my meadow
you can carve your name on my tree
it will bind in a state of glow (yellow/gold)
a euphoric freedom with me
whether it was bright or bleak
we’d stand through thin and thick
we meet the adversary blow for blow
till we vanquish every foe
Cherry blossoms on the ground
have only just fallen from the sky
but the bloom in love we are bound
is that which will never die
the daffodil bed we made is its marrow
and the winter bird plays possum
down south is the home for the sparrow
where the cherry bushes will blossom
Little Borrowers 